Shattered
by EEE-XERO-333
Summary: After Robin disappears the titans begin to accept new changes into their lifestyles. Will they let their former friend slip into fond memories or will they be able to find him? Who is the girl that looks life Terra? What's Red X's identity? And who is the new villain Slade has taken under his wing?
1. Prologue

When theres trouble U know who to caaaalllllll...TEEN TITANS! Hellllooooooo my loves! I am so psyched to b starting this new adventure with u! I hope ya'll enjoy the story. This is the prelude in case u were wondering. This is gonna be so exciting! Hope u enjoy it! R&R pweez :3

It was the cool air of the crisp night that drove him out of bed each morning. The ambiance of night. The orchestra of the animals and city folk. The rush. God, the rush! When your adrenaline pumps life in your veins, your heart skips a beat then accents higher and faster and faster!

And him. Robin. The titans were like his personal chew toy. He would gnaw at them until there was nothing left. But Robin was a particular challenge. He'd even managed to make him mad, he posed a threat, rather impressive for Batman's little brat. By little he meant young. The boy was a boy, not a man. Certainly no older than seventeen, not even old enough to drink.

Still, even being so young, he'd managed to escape him, nearly destroy him. He'd managed to do a lot of things. Even if the boy did not admit it, he had learned from the apprenticeship. He'd also enjoyed it a little. All he knew was good. Change that, and you can change anything.

Warp his mind even further. As he leaped in the sky into the shadows, Slade pondered exactly how'd he get this bird to wonder out of the golden cage. How'd he get him to fly in the open sky.

Warp...yes...the villain Warp might be useful. Yet...still. He needed Batman's training. He needed the death of his parents to harden his heart. No. He could not change the past. The past is what made Robin who he was, it is what has given him the qualities of an apprentice.

Still, that stubborn brain of his. How would he taint it, change it without breaking it. The thing out Robin was he wanted to try to get him to be his apprentice. Breaking him to be that would be a challenge. He wanted him to be a follower of him not a servant, he also did not want to shatter his soul. He had to be careful if he was going to do this right.

Terra was easy, far too easy for his taste. He liked the challenge. Robin was a challenge. Although the boy was a challenge and had earned a minor place of respect he was still a child in Slade's eyes. Robin often bordered on the line of intelligent boldness to stubborn pigheadedness. He'd have to fix that.

The girl, Terra, was not a challenge. Well, not until the end. He'd honestly not seen that coming. A mistake he kept making. He always underestimated his enemy. Terra was full of cracks, very easy to shatter. All he had to do was glue some pieces together in the way he wished and she was his. Robin was not like that.

He had his cracks, as everyone, not as much as Terra and not as deep, but yes he had weak points. He'd tried using his friends against him, but that was a mistake. His team were a bunch of clever brats when it came to it. They managed to do so much for their age. Impressive. Yet still, no challenge. Slade could eliminate the titans whenever he wished, but it was unnecessary and besides, he might want them later. He'd needed them when his body was stolen form him by Trigon, of course Slade hadn't expected the same incident occurring but he still might need the titans alive for other purposes. Besides, Robin wasn't ready for their deaths yet.

Slade thought of Red X. The fact robin figured he could fool him with that was rather humorous, but clever. It showed Robin's dark side. Yes, he'd do such things to get to him. This was what he wanted. Then the titans showed up and ruined it. Ah well, the inevitable will come in due time.

But a new Red X ran around the city. Sloppy and careless. Yet he had shown him a hidden skill Robin had. Robin was able to copy his movements of his enemy. He'd taken Slade's form during the Trigon incident. He'd used X's techniques when fighting Chang. Yes. He liked to learn. He craved the rush.

This was valuable information. Useful. A way Slade could warp Robin's mind. True, he messed with the teen for apprenticeship purposes but also just because he enjoyed the scowl on Robin's face. He tried hiding it with scowls and obsessions and hateful words, but Slade knew the truth. He learned from him, and liked it. He wanted to know more. He enjoyed the experience.

Not many things stood in his way of getting Robin. But there are obstacles in every challenge, else it wouldn't be a challenge. Ah...the challenge.

Of course the titans. His friends would never stop searching for him, and he knew the would eventually figure it out. robin would never give in to him knowing his friends were searching for him. If he killed them, Robin's reaction would be uncertain only not good.

Batman. As his mentor, if Robin is missing then he will search for his "son". Batman was a rather intelligent man, he would be a rather formidable adversary. But of course Slade was after an apprentice not a good fight.

Other villains might want a piece of Robin, but they'd back off if it meant death of the titans.

And of course, Robin himself. He never dreamt Robin would give in easily. His consent would be a gradual, painful process.

Slade was letting the wind take his breath. The sun was rising. Soon school would start. Very soon.

Robin didn't go to school. Looking at his former grades it seems he didn't need to. True Robin didn't go to school, but someone did.

Slade perched himself in the darkness and watched the kids mob the school. Makurami High. He noticed a blue-eyed blonde girl walk with two other unknown bystanders.

Tara Markov a.k.a Terra and Slade's apprentice. She was doing well. The changeling had nearly lost his mind chasing her. The fact he had mentioned his name to the titans would make Robin uneasy. He'd be cautious and no doubt spend many nights obsessing over his identity and motives. This was good.

He waited until the blonde girl disappeared then looked off into the distance. Titan Tower. Home of the titans. Home of Robin. Home of his soon to be apprentice.

First he'd need the bait, then the trap. Slade did so much love to birdwatch, only if the bird was Robin. Robin. The one that got away. The bird that slipped out of its cage, no..not slipped. Broke. Shattered that cage, let it fall to the ground and break then studied the pieces. Fine, two could play that game. He was going to shatter Robin's world, like he did Slade's. But this time there would be no glue to fix it. At least, not the way Robin would have it. Not in the least bit.

**Meanwhile in Titan Tower...**

Robin hated wasting time, thats why he got up early. No use lazing around. By he time the high school started class, Robin had already trained, ate, and was working on a project that most likely had to do with Slade.

Today was odd, his alarm didn't go off. Even if it hadn't most of the time he'd gotten up anyway due to pure habit. But he slept in. In fact, it was already nine!

Robin rose out of his bed. By this time even his friends were up and at em while their leader was lazing around in bed! He yawned. He was so tired, he felt fatigue. He hadn't even done anything yet! Arg! What happened? He hadn't done anything too exhausting. Well, except, Slade. Yeah, he was spending more and more time working on Slade. Wasting time was more like it. And as meantioned said before, Robin hates wasting time. Look what its done to him!

By the time Robin had finished getting ready for the day, his friends were already doing their regular routines. Raven reading, the guys video game battling, and Star attempting to cook.

Robin went off to the main room were his friends had already gathered. "Morning, Robin!" Starfire cheered as she flew to his side.

"Dude, you feeling okay? It's like nine and you're just now getting up?" Cyborg asked.

"I'm fine." Robin mumbled.

Raven peered up form her book. "Exactly what were you doing last night? All night?" She asked. Robin remembered staying up far to late with his Slade project, he barley remembered even going to his own bed. Had he? Had someone taken him there? No, not possible.

"Robin?" Star asked. She looked worriedly at her friend. He looked worn out, beaten. She didn't like seeing him this way.

Robin snapped back into reality. "Just a project." He said trying to escape the girls questioning eyes.

"What kind of project?" Asked Raven dryly. She knew he wasn't telling her something. What it was, she had no idea.

"Just a project okay? Stop asking, it's my life I can do what I want!" He snapped. Raven closed her book and got up. Robin sighed. "Raven, i'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"Whatever." she said and left the room. Silence.

"What was that all about?" Beast boy asked. Cy elbowed him. "Dude!" BB yelled. They went back to their usual gaming and friends arguing while Star looked at Robin with an even more worried look.

"Robin? Are you feeling of the illness?" She asked.

Robin shook his head. 'I'm fine Star." Fine. I'm not fine, he told himself. I feel angry for no reason, I feel tried, I feel like I wanna destroy something, I feel like I wanna rip someone's head off! Please, help me! but he shrugged it off and went to go apologize to Raven letting Star worry more about her friend.

Robin knocked on his goth friend's door. "Raven? Look, i'm sorry for snapping at you. Raven?" He called for her.

The door slid open just enough for Robin to see the left eye of his friend's face. "I'm sorry." He said again. The door fully opened.

"Whats going on with you?" She asked. "You're acting...different." Robin was silent. "It's him isn't it? It's Sl-"

"No!" He yelled. Raven stopped. Robin sighed, "No. Well...I don't know. Maybe." he said.

Raven looked at Robin, really looked at him. She knew more about him than the other titans combined and still it meant almost nothing. The titans shared all their secrets. Cyborg's former self, Beast Boy's old team, Starfire's royalty and family, Raven's demonic heritage...what had Robin told them about his past? Nothing.

"I know you're mad at me." Robin said. Raven looked up from the floor, she hadn't realized she went off into her own world for a moment there. "We have a link, remember?"

"Yeah, a link we wouldn't have if chasing Slade didn't make you loose all your senses." She said bitterly.

Robin looked down. "There are so many things I wanna tell you, Raven. So many things."

"Then tell me."

"I can't." He said looking back at her with a saddened expression.

Raven couldn't help it. She rarely lost her temper, but Robin was one of the few people who could just be...so...**aggravating**! "You can't, huh? You want to but just can't! We have shared everything with you! You know just about all out secrets! We've shared our tales willingly, to each other, and you've just kept to yourself! You continuously push yourself in the dark, push yourself away from us! You still wear a mask around us! If were friends how come you don't even trust us?" She yelled.

Robin tried reaching out for her but she pulled away. "I do trust you Raven, I trust all of you. I keep secrets for your own protection."

Raven felt like screaming. "Our own protection? The last time it was for our own protection the titans almost broke apart, Robin you almost died! You can't not tell us things because it is for out own protection! Were friends! Were in this together! We've all gone through a lot. Whatever you wen't through i'm sure was tough, but it's over. Done! Get over it, let the past die! Were the present! Let us help you!"

Robin clenched his fists. Past..die...Zucco! "I can never forgive him for what he did to them!" Robin muttered.

"Robin, you're the only one who has yet to have dealt with their past. Let us help you." Raven said.

"No..." He muttered. "I can never forgive him! Not after..." Robin looked down. He had done what he'd trained himself to do. Replace sadness with hate. Take the tears and turn them into rage. Anger, pure anger, anger he kept inside and it was getting so large it was devouring his very soul.

"After dealing with my dad, you saved me, Robin. If it weren't for you, i'd be lost. Let me save you. I feel it. I know you understand. Your anger, it's eating away at your core. It's destroying you. Robin, please. Let me-"

The alarm sounded. "Trouble!" Robin said, snapping into hero mode. He rushed off and Raven flew behind him. Don't think this is over. She said in her mind. The fact Robin didn't look her in the eye made it clear. He knew it wasn't over. It was far from over. Far, far, far from over...

**In** **Makurami High...**

By the time the titans had nearly caught the beast, the white monster disappeared yet again. They had no idea what this monster wanted or why it kept disappearing, but it had to be stopped. "Everyone, back to class! All of you! Until we sort this mess out!" The principal boomed. The walls were broken, lockers were bent, kids were freaked. Tension..so much tension...Robin felt it screaming in his head..it hurt...his skull was about to burst!

"Robin of the Teen Titans." the principal addressed him. "What happened to my school?!" He screamed. BB chimed in, "Well, you see we uh-"

"You?! My students have been complaining about you, Mr. Boy. If you're going to keep coming around here, I suggest you enroll." He jabbed a finger in Robin's chest. "As for you-"

"Sir, were doing the best we can. Rest assure that monster will be caught." He said.

"Not only that, but why aren't you in school? Young man, how old are you?" The principal asked. Wow, even the titans didn't know that. Actually it's more like even the _titans_ didn't know _that!_

Robin's face stood stone strong. "I've already graduated school, sir." the Titans were shocked! Star wondered exactly hat age did humans graduate from the school, Cyborg questioned who Robin was before Robin existed, Raven figured something was amiss and Robin wasn't telling them the whole story(as usual), BB wondered if Robin had graduated high school why was he so short?

A familiar blonde girl walked by the halls a group of kids behind her. "Um, sir?"

"Why aren't you in class, young lady?!" He boomed. She pointed to the wreckage that used to be a classroom. The principal's mouth dropped. "Oh, I see."

Cyborg's eyes widened. This girl resembled her greatly. Robin saw it, her eyes. Yeah, they looked the same. Raven, oh Raven, was almost at a breaking point. But...it can't be...it just isn't possible! BB felt himself holding his breath, his heart stop, his shoulder slump, his mouth drop, his eyes widen. Terra...

BB stared wide-eyed. "Terra." He whispered.

The other titans were shocked as well. "Terra?" Robin said. The principal looked at Robin again, he cocked an eyebrow.

"What? Who?" Robin ignored him.

"Terra is that you?" He asked The blonde girl stepped back a bit.

"I don't know what your talking about. My name's Tara, not Terra." She said. "Sorry." Beast Boy came up from the rest. Tara dodged him completely and suddenly blended with he shadows. Like she had just evaporated.

With Ter-Tara gone into the shadows, there was now only a single matter to deal with. The principal. Robin sighed. He looked back at the principal. "We'll get out of your way. Rest assured the Titians are on this!" He said and the titans went off. The sound of him yelling at the teens was drowned out by cheers of glee from the others students.

"Go, Titans, go!"

"Starfire's so hot, man!"

"I love you Raven!"

"There so awesome!"

"Beast Boy is so funny!"

"Cyborg is a boss, dude!"

"Robin is my favorite!"

"We love you titans!"

Robin smiled. The first good thing today. That feeling of a suden rush, butterflies in his stomach, a light and airy feeling. A proudness swelling his heart, forming in his chest. A good feeling. The feeling he's doing something right.

**Meanwhile...**

Slade loved watching the titans fight. Robin, of course, was the most interesting. No powers and yet managed to lead a team of superhereos. Interesting indeed.

What secrets did the boy hide? How old was he? What was his true eye color? What of his past? Little was known about him. He was mentored by Batman in Gotham. There, thats his biography. But he must've been someone before Robin! Who is Robin?

Slade smiled under his mask. _The same questions he must ask of me. Oh, what of it_, he thought, _i'll soon find out who this bird really is. Then, i'll clip his wings_. _None the less, he'll still be my apprentice. _

The boy wonder leaped into the air with his friends. A smile on his face. A girl back at the school screamed above the other cheers, "You're my favorite, Robin! I love you!"

Slade chuckled to himself. He liked hearing the girls fan over the titans. Cute. Amusing. It seemed the bird enjoyed the fame a little.

"Smile all you wan't Robin...you're true nightmare is about to begin."

**Back in the Tower...**

Beast Boy was very uneasy. His stomach felt light, his head spun, his chest swelled. Why?

That girl. Her hair, those eyes, everything about her screamed Terra. The only thing missing was one piece. Happiness.

BB stood in Terra's old room. The starry canvas above made him feel lonelier somehow yet even so, he felt with her and then his loneliness died. Died. Killed. Slade had killed Terra, and she was never coming back. But she was back, right? He noticed the heart mirror box he'd made for her. The box was empty, BB felt another void in his soul. "Who killed your happiness, Terra?" He asked aloud.

"She's gone ya know." A dark vice had said. BB spun to see a familiar face. "She isn't coming back."

BB scowled and looked back at the box. Raven was wrong. She had to be. That was Terra! "It had to be Terra. It has to be!"

Raven looked at the box and floated to her friend. "I know it's hard to lose someone special to you, but she's gone. You're not doing yourself any favors by holding on this way." She told him.

BB stared at Raven, never had she seen a more serious look in his eyes. "Look me in the eyes and tell me that girl didn't look just like her. Look me in the eyes and tell me to just forget it and let go when i'm so close!"

Raven questioned this a moment. She had tried to save her, but she wasn't powerful enough. Terra was gone. It was the only logical answer. Raven looked at BB with her usual apathetic stare. "Forget about Terra. Let it go." Raven paused, BB seemed hurt. He stepped back a bit. "She's gone Beast Boy." Raven turned and began to leave, jus before she disappeared behind the door she turned around. "I'm..sorry." With that she was gone.

BB sat alone, only the mirror box in his hand. A heart as empty as he reflecting off darkness and nothing. Robin came through the door a few moments after Raven had disappeared. "Beast Boy, you alright?" He asked.

BB looked at the ground. "That's a dumb question." He said bitterly. Before Robin could respond BB looked up at him. "Sorry. I didn't mean..what I-"

"It's okay, Beast Boy. I understand." He told his green friend.

He understood? How cute. How completely and utterly predictable! Everyone is so sorry and they understand! How could they?

"No, you don't. You don't understand at all! How could you know what it's like to lose someone? How could you understand how it feels to know who did it but you know you'll never get your revenge? How could you possibly understand?!" BB yelled, his voice cracked at the end making him feel slightly embarrassed.

Robin's eyes saddened. _I do understand BB. How can I tell you I understand your pain and that i'm here for you an that i'll do everything to help you get justice, to explain vengeance is wrong? How can I help you like Bruce helped me? Like Alfred helped Bruce? How can I help you? _

"I..you're right. I don't understand your pain. But you're still my friend, Beast Boy. Just know if you need someone, i'm here for you."

Silence. Nothing but BB's back to Robin. He wanted to be alone. "I want to be alone." BB said. Oh, Beast Boy, Robin thought, I know thats exactly the opposite of what you want to be right now. Robin knew what he needed to do. Embrace his friend and tell him it's okay, tell him his troubles, share his secrets, and help him get justice. That's what he should've done. But instead he turned to the door and left. No goodbyes, no sorries. Robin knew sorry meant nothing to him at this point. He knew saying anything made it worse. So instead of speaking he left Beast Boy all alone in the dark with only his memories to comfort him into the haunting night.

**Robin's "Slade Stalking" Room(Because I don't know what else to call it)...**

Robin was alone. He liked working alone but at the same time he didn't. Alone meant time to think. Alone meant no one to save you from your nightmares.

He rubbed his temples. Just because BB was catching his crazy didn't mean he needed to kick in hyper drive on the Slade research. Or did it?

"Robin?" A familiar voice called him from the darkness of his mind. A dry and dark tone.

"Raven!" Robin looked up surprised at who was standing in the doorway. Normally it would be Starfire. But Raven was an odd surprise.

"You feeling alright?" She asked dryly looking at all of Robin's scattered papers, gears, and the horrid Slade mask that haunted him day and night. The lights were on and several lamps were lit.

After the whole Slade coming back in Robin's head, the haunting, Robin had never been quite right with the dark. Even though he never showed it or perhaps didn't realize it himself, the night still haunted him. _That's right Robin_, she thought, _I hear you screaming even when you're silent. I can hear you screaming._

"I'm fine." He replied. Fine. What an understatement. It means so many things but the actual word.

Raven would've walked over to him, but something kept her form doing so. An off energy emanated from the room. It was painful to just stand in the doorway. How could Robin stand it? Was it..his own energy? No, it couldn't be, not this energy it was far to...evil. It couldn't be...right?

"Raven?" Robin called out. She hadn't realized she had zoned out. She looked up at him. Robin's energy changed, softer and kinder. The entire room felt more welcoming. The thing she suddenly feared the most came into reality. Slade was winning this battle. Even without his presence, by the mere thought, Slade was winning Robin. Yes, it was true. By the mere thought of him Robin changed. He became ruthless, cunning, dark...not himself. He was slowly being sucked into the dark, and she couldn't save him. But she had to. He'd saved her, he'd saved her many times, but he'd really saved her when she needed it most. True, the titans, her friends, helped. But truly Robin alone saved her. Now she had to call him back from the darkness.

"Robin, you need to stop this obsession." She told him bluntly. His aura changed into the darker one, although she could tell he was trying to suppress it.

"Raven, i'm not obsessed." He replied in a nonchalant tone.

Raven looked at all the newspaper articles, research material, masks, parts from the haunt, gears from the Slade bots..."Riiiiight." She said.

Robin looked around. His aura changed again. It was...confusion. As if he opened his eyes but it was too late to save himself.

"I can't have him endangering you again. Any of you. I already lost a friend to him once. I won't let it happen twice." Robin said.

With this Raven thought of Terra. There was no way she was alive. No way that girl was her. But still. And Beast Boy, poor, poor Beast Boy. Longing for her. And endangering them. Yeah, she remembered that. She remembered the pain. Yes, there was that red hot pain inside her when the probes activated, but the pain of losing her friend hurt her beyond feeling. She was not going to let it happen again. No. Not because of him. Not because of Slade.

"Why?" She asked. A look of sadness in her eyes. Robin rarely saw Raven's emotions so blunt. The Trigon incident was a rare occasion, but this was genuine concern. A sense of...hopelessness and helplessness.

"Why what?" He asked confused.

"Why do you always force all the weight on your shoulders? We're friends, aren't we? Why are we too weak to help carry your pain? Help you? Why can't we help you?" She asked. Robin looked away.

"I don't need any help."

Raven stood still. She wanted to say so many things right then, But se left. She left him in the dark. She left him wondering why was it he couldn't ask for help from a friend.

**Slade's New Haunt...**

Everything was going excellent. Everything was going according to plan. His current apprentice, not his prize choice, but doing well. Playing her part.

"You did well with your meeting with the titans. Very entertaining." He said.

A blonde girl with blue eyes that shimmer like moonbeams nodded. "Thank you, master. But is it wise to alert them of my presence this way?" _Beast Boy,_ she thought, _what wrongs i've done to you._

Slade turned to her. "Would you rather continue messing with the changeling? Terra, there not your friends. Not anymore. Especially after what you've done to them. No. He most likely hates you with every fiber of his being." He turned away, hoping his scar would prove most effective.

Terra held back the tears. _No, it's not true. It can't be! Not him! Please! I'm sorry...I-I-I..._

Her face suddenly went level with the ground. Pain. That meant one thing. Training time.

With great effort she lifted her head to see Slade's arm pushing down on her, forcing her to eat the dirt.

"Never get distracted. Never let your mind wonder away from you." He released her and then the training began.

Yes, Terra had gotten better. Could she match Slade? Robin barley managed that, so no. Could she defeat Robin? Not yet. Most likely, not ever. Not where Slade wanted him to go. But she had gotten better, yes, far better than last time.

The punches flew, the yells echoed, the world whirled pain and anger. Eventually, as normal, Terra quiet, unable to go on and completely worn out and exhausted while SLade had yet to break a sweat. Terra was done. Slade used one last finishing blow and before she hit the ground and fell to darkness she had but one thought. _I'm sorry, Beast Boy. I'm so sorry!_

**Jump City Streets...**

Robin was...well Robin didn't know what he was. Confused? Angry? Sad? Depressed? Inquisitive? What was he feeling? What was the dang feeling that made his heart hurt so much?!

Robin was letting the air whizz past him as he rode his bike. He needed to clear his head. Get his mind off Slade.

The dark. That horrid darkness that calls forth the nightmares from the beckoning shadows of death. That haunting night moonlight. The stars are nothing but dead eyes, the air nothing put a masked scent, the sky nothing but black death.

But his motorbike let him forget that. He focussed only on his bike. The slim edges, red style. The tight grip on the handle bar. Numb fingers, wind against his back. That sharp wind that hit like fire yet was so motivating. God, he loved it!

Robin had taken a nice ride, but was now in a dark part of town. Of course no way in hades was Robin going to let his city be run by criminals, but theres always a bad part of town. That's why he wasn't Robin tonight. He was a normal civilian. His dark shades still masked his face. No one would see his eyes, like always.

Still he looked almost completely different. Blue jeans, tee shirt, baggy jacket, hoodie, hair smoothed down instead of spiked up. He had only been civilian like once with the titans, that was in Tokyo.

Why would Robin want to do this? Simple. Get away from it all. Be someone else with no hero issues. Be alone, to think, no interruptions and no helping friends. ALone time. Think time. No Slade time.

Why this part of town? Easy enough. His friends would never think to look here. Nor would anyone care what a kid was doing in this part of town. He could handle any fight, but it was likely no one would give him trouble if he stayed in the right light of dark.

So normal civilian not Robin went to a bar. Ordered only water, and sat there alone and silent. One guy had tried causing trouble but a punch to the face and one nosebleed later sorted out the problems.

"Hey, kid. How old are you anyway?" The bar tender asked.

Robin stayed still.

"Whats a kid like you doin here anyway? A bar? In the middle of the night? You can't be more than fifteen!"

"I'm twenty-one." He lied.

"You know here we don't care if your twelve. As long as you got money."

Silence. "Sixteen." He whispered.

"Wha?"

"I'm sixteen." He said a bit louder, still not looking him in the eye.

The tender whistled. "Mighty young to be out here this late. Mighty young to be here anyway."

"Clearing my head."

The tender heard loud drunkards yelling, the television blaring, swearing..."Here. Clear your head in a place like this?" He wrinkled his nose.

Robin nodded.

"Son, I respect the fact you can handle yourself well. But here? Well, this place ain't for fifteen year old boys wanting to clear their heads. Try the park or somethin."

"I like the noise. Helps me think. Helps me let go."

"Let go? Ah, you and your girlfriend break up?"

"I don't have a girlfriend."

The tender was a bit silent. "Boyfriend?" Robin arched an eyebrow. The tender spoke quickly. "Not like theres anything wrong with-"

"An enemy." Robin finished, looking back down at his glass of water.

"An enemy?" The tender asked.

"Yes."

Silence. No one spoke for a while. Someone ordered a glass of beer and the tender went back to the kid who was quite interesting and mysterious.

"Whats a fifteen year old boy have to let go of? What kinda enemy you got? You in a gang?"

"No." Silence. Robin spoke again. "I need to let go of my enemy. He's gone. It's done."

The tender was quiet. "He..dead?"

"I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not. None the less, I need to let go. At least for tonight." He finished.

The tender nodded. "I see. This is a great place to let go of things, especially bad memories. Might I suggest something stronger than water then?" He asked.

"No thanks."

"Good, wasn't planning on giving you anything anyway."

"Unless it was for the right prince." Robin told him.

"Smart fella, ain't cha? Get you far in life being smart. Not just IQ smart but street smart. Not may have both. Not many have either one. You seem to be one of them lucky ones who got both. What did you say your name was?" He asked.

"I didn't say." Robin reminded him.

The tender smiled. "Real smart. No, wise. Street wise. Real special. Real rare. Thats not just IQ, it can't be learned. Street smart can be learned, street wise is a talent. Natural. You go to school?"

"No."

"Shame." The tender's eyes got hazy. "No kid stays in school anymore. Would've loved to finish school, myself. Couldn't though. Family matters. This job ain't so bad. Better than being a criminal. What are you kid? You help the family?"

"Don't have one."

"Shame. This part of town, that seems far too common. No gang, no family. You a criminal?"

"No." Robin said dark and dryly. He was remaining stone cold. Stone solid.

"Bless the lord. Many turn to criminals here. Keep a good head on, nose clean, I promise you'll get someone one day. Wait n' see kid."

The bar tender went back to work. Not even ten minutes later, money was left under an empty glass of water and the fifteen year old boy was gone.

Robin was glad to be out of there. That guy asked too many questions. It was a dark alley and he was alone. Not the safest of places to be, but he could handle it. He just had to get to his bike.

"Been a while, hasn't it, Robin?" An all to familiar voice echoed in the darkness.

Robin wanted to spin around and attack. _No, it's jus the dark. Not real, not real, not real, not real...NOT REAL! _

"Just because you wear a disguise won't mean it ill fool me. Honestly Robin, you think that could fool me? I'll always find you. I'll always be there. In your nightmares, in your head!" It hissed.

Robin fell to the floor. "NO! Stay out of my head! Slade!" He cried out. _Not real, not real, not real, please don't let this be real!_

Slade whooshed down behind Robin. "Honestly now, you think telling me to go away will work? Please, Robin. I know your stronger than that. Or have you gotten sloppy while I was away?"

Robin turned and let the punches fly. Not even doing any strategy, no plan. Pointless violence. Blind fighting. Opposite of what Bruce had taught him.

Slade dodged them all with no sweat. A moment's hesitation rom Robin, catching his breath. _My turn. _The first punch landed on Robin's face. This caused him to fall back. The second blow landed on his gut, knocking his breath out. Then his legs felt a rush of power and the fell from under him. On the ground he was going to get up, but a blow to his chest from Slade's boot made it impossible. Struggling under him, Robin desperately tried to break free.

"Look at you, Robin," Slade said. "You squirming like a worm. I'm the bird this time. I can teach you, you don't have to be the prey. You can be a hawk. Or you can be the underling the hawks devour."

Robin kept struggling. _Gotta get away, gotta get away!_

Slade chuckled to himself."You honestly think you can escape me?" Slade took his boot and rammed it against Robin's head. The boy wonder's vision blurred, he felt dizzy and tired. His world began to slowly slip away. "Don't worry, little bird. It will all be over soon." The man hissed and Robin felt the darkness drag him under.


	2. Chapter 1

Alrighty then! Next chaps is here! I hope ya'll enjoy it! R&R pweez! Keep readin my loves!

It was that bitter winter when it doesn't matter how pure the snow looks, how adorable the bundled up children are, how sweet the laughter sounds, or how many warm faces greet you. That stilled moment of the year when every neighbor is kind, the world is lit up in a colorful array of sunshine and plastic reindeer hooked up to a fake Santa Claus sleigh. For a moment everything is peaceful in everyone's eyes but your own. A normal Teen Titan Christmas involved the attempt of the guys putting up decorations around the tower like lights and a tree. It involved laughter, cookies, and a moment where the villains became peaceful for a time and Robin became a little more relaxed. Everyone was in spirit. Even Raven, well mostly. She would eventually show her true affections during the season if you were clever enough to understand it. Star was fascinated by lights and cheerful moods. All the titans loved this time of year.

This year, though, there was none of it. Beast Boy tried to put of lights and make merry, but eventually even Cyborg stopped trying and Star stopped smiling. Raven was almost never out of her room, and BB's stupid jokes started to become extinct. Perhaps the joy of Christmas would brighten everything up? No. It didn't. How could it? Their leader and friend was gone.

It was weird one day he was by their side and then the next he vanished. No earthly trace left behind. He was just gone. The worst part was not knowing. Not knowing weather he was dead or alive. Not knowing what happened or why he left. Not knowing where he was or why he was there or if Robin was even Robin anymore. The part that shook Starfire was that Robin could have easily gone undercover and become a civilian without them knowing, she could pass him by everyday she goes out into the city and not even realize it.

It has been about a year since the boy wonder had gone missing. No one had heard from him since that night. No one has seen him. Due to the fact he has melted away so well for so long makes the titans think he doesn't even want to be found.

That dreadful morning when the team realized their leader was gone they spent hours searching. Raven was the first to bring attention a similar situation had occurred once before. When Slade forced Robin into an apprenticeship. But they had not seen Robin robbing anything at all. In fact he was completely and utterly off the radar.

Perhaps he was in Gotham with Batman. They titans were sure if Robin was in a tight enough spot or needed guidance he was wise and mature enough to return to his old mentor for advice. But no such luck had occurred. In fact, once the titans brought up their missing teammate Batman was livid. They weren't sure who he was angry with, but they knew he was angry. Starfire thought he was angry at them for being such bad friends. Raven assumed he was angry with Robin for being missing. Beast Boy figured Batman was normally intimidating. Cyborg guessed maybe he was mad at the world just because it was suddenly crashing down. Alfred knew though. Alfred knew who Bruce was angry at. He was angry at himself for not being there, for letting his "son" go missing right before his eyes, for letting Robin slip through his fingers, for not holding on too tight. Bruce always feared relaxing his hold on Robin would make something like this happen. Alfred feared holding on too tight would make Robin struggle more and something like this would happen. Robin himself would rather have not been smothered. Bruce held on so tightly, so afraid to lose control, and now it had pushed his boy away from him. So far away he doesn't know where he is anymore.

The Greatest Detective in the World was on the case. It mattered not. For Robin remained unfound. Whatever happened was big. Bruce figured three things. Either Robin does not want to be found, if so then they'll have to wait because a man on the run who wants to stay on the run will be on the run until he wants to stop running, or someone took him. If he was kidnapped this man was clever and plotting big time or else would've already held a ransom of some sort, unless he was using Robin for other purposes. Bruce shivered at the thought. The last was what Bruce had finally decided on. It was best this way. Robin was dead. His body was taken and disposed of so well that it would never be found. His son was dead, and it was all his fault.

So thus, you can see why Christmas wasn't a joyous day for the titans. They did try. Did gifts, had hot chocolate, and even laughed a bit. But something was missing. They still had Robin's gifts wrapped, his stocking stocked, and his place in their hearts became a black void of pain. It was so hard to say goodbye when they couldn't. Closure wasn't an option. That was the worst of it.

BB had a hard time losing both Terra and Robin. He couldn't deal with it. But over the period of Robin's absence he and Tara had grown closer. The other titans had become aquatinted with her as well. She had been invited to the Christmas day joyous celebration, but she hadn't come. It was less than joyful anyway. After the gifts the titans had all day. They went about doing their work instead of being together. Just like always. Because of being out of sync with each other and Robin's absence they fought worse. Crime had gone up since the rumor of the boy wonder's death. This made life even worse for them all.

After breakfast BB went to go see Tara. Normally he'd walk her home after school. They'd go out on weekends, the park or arcade. He'd help her with school to the best of his ability but normally she'd teach him and get used to the material. HE was a great study buddy, and a great best friend. He had meet her father, nice and sensible man. Her mother was a workaholic but very kind to him even though he'd only meet her a few times. They had grown quite close indeed. Good friends. Great even. Tara had had a family Christmas and although happy she was a happy as a fifteen year old girl could be with a big family celebration.

Beast Boy was bundled up, standing outside Tara's home. The snow fell at a peaceful grace and covered the ground like a blanket. It was hard to walk in, and it was very cold. But she was worth it. BB realized the Markov house was bursting with energy. Happy energy. True Christmas spirit. His hand stopped in midair. Inched from the doorbell he paused. _Should I?_ He looked in the window. She saw Tara's family laughing and joyfully prancing, dancing, singing, eating, talking. The whole shebang. Gift unwrapping, smiles, cookies, adult conversation, kiddies running around uncontrolled, fire roasting chestnuts. Christmas joy. _They're all so happy. I-I don't want to ruin her Christmas. _

A certain bored out of her mind blonde blue-eyed girl noticed a green changeling walking away from her house. In a rush she opened the door and let the snowflakes peacefully fall on top of her head.

"Beast Boy!" She called.

The green teen turned around, astonished. "Tara?" He whispered.

She stood in the doorway for a while then closed the door and wondered outside he rushed to her and out his coat over her.

"You shouldn't be out here, you'll catch cold!" He said holding her tightly.

"You're the one out here all alone in the snow. What are you doing here? Alone? And on Christmas?" She asked.

"I-I didn't have anything better to do than trudge through the snow. But I had to see you. I had to make Christmas seem like Christmas again. I had to at least see you."

"Then why didn't you come inside, dummy?" She said, smiling a bit.

BB reamed a still saddened expression. "I didn't want to ruin your Christmas."

"Ruin my Christmas? What are you talking about! I wanted to see you! You should have just come inside. Come on! I'll get you some hot chocolate and warm you up-" she began to drag him inside but they got two steps and then..

"You mean, I won't ruin your Christmas?" He asked.

She turned to him. "Why on earth would you think that? You're my best friend! Christmas is about spending time with friends and family!" She said smiling.

"Yeah, I know. It's just..."

"Just what?" She asked, her smiling fading realizing her typically jokeative friend is very serious.

"Christmas isn't quite the same this year. Not so joyous when there isn't that much to be joyous about. Expect you."

"Well other than me, you have the safety of the city! And the fact most everyone has a Christmas this year, so you should too."

"I'm not really in the mood, Tara."

"Why not? Oh. Is it? Is it him? Your friend?" She asked. Robin was a touchy subject, she knew this. So was Terra. Her friend had lost so many people. So many friends. "I understand. You're sad. I know what it's like to lose someone. And I know it may seem silly to celebrate, but I think its a reason to celebrate. Celebrate life. Celebrate that friendship. Live on even when he can't. I think your friend would've wanted that. Friendships, family, caring for one another that's what Christmas is about. And I-I...I want to spend my Christmas with you." She told him with a resurrected smile.

It had been a while since BB smiled that truly. She took him inside and introduced him to the family. He'd even been invited to stay for Christmas dinner. Like out of the movies everything was great and fun. And for the first time in a long time, as he held Tara's hand and laughed, Beast Boy truly felt happy.

**Meanwhile in Raven's Room...**

A girl in violet laid out on her bed and stared at the ceiling of her dark room. That night haunted her everyday. She was the last titan to see him, to see Robin. Was it her fault she let him get away? Did she drive him out? Her last words were a question, why can't we help you?

Why didn't she try? Even if he refused help why didn't she play the role of the good friend and keep trying. The others would have. BB would've said something stupid, eventually make Robin get his mind off work and back to something else. Cy would have talked sense into him. Star, well, Star would've made him smile. And that would've been good enough. But no, it was her. Her last words in his mind. Her, the one person who couldn't help him. The one person who couldn't make him stay.

Why? Why did it have to end like this? She laid her head on hr pillow and held back tears. The empathetic girl was used to pushing away emotions, but they were building up inside her. She released it with meditation, something Robin understood. But lately, it wasn't working so well. Slade was destroying Robin and Robin was destroying her.

Raven noticed she was suddenly in a room. A familiar place now covered in dust, But for this point in time someone was in there far to often. A spiked haired Robin was messing with gears and fidgeting with papers. Raven stared blankly. "Robin?" She whispered. As if by magic the boy looked up at her.

"Raven!" He asked.

Raven was overcome. She was going to run to him when an oddly familiar voice stopped her. "You feeling alright?" She paused. It was..her voice. She spun around to see herself in the doorway. _But i'm right here. _

The scene replayed. That horrid night replayed itself right in front of her. "Why can't we help you?!" Her other self screamed.

Robin looked away from her. "I don't need any help." He said. It echoed in her mind.

The past Raven began walking out the door when, "NO!" Current Raven screamed. She grabbed onto her other self's shoulders. Time froze and she went on. "Make him stay! Say something! Say something to make him stay! Please, if you convince him to stay he won't die! Please!" She screamed.

Raven turned to Robin, frozen in time. "Please!" She shrieked, holding him tight. "PLESE DON"T LEAVE ME!" She wailed. Falling to her knees the scene played out and the door began to shut. "Noooooooooooooo-"

"NOOO!" Raven screamed. She awoke with a start. Her heart pounding, her body in her bed. She sighed. _Only a dream_. She laid back on her pillow and felt something wet against her cheek. She sat up and felt her pillow. It was wet. Why? She suddenly realized she'd been crying.

Raven flipped her pillow over and laid back down. It was time to sleep. _Robin. Why didn't I stop you? Why did I have to relive that night every time I shut my eyes?! Robin...WHY?! _She let it out. Raven the stone solid goth, the girl with no emotions, the rock of the team began to cry herself to sleep.

**Meanwhile On the Tower's Rooftop...**

It was snowing. Not a blizzard, not windy. It was a graceful dance in the winter breeze, a chill up your spine and through your hair, nipping at your nose. The snowflakes danced down to earth. So peaceful.

Cyborg of the titans was on the roof of the tower enjoying the falling snow. A single flake falling from the sky that eventually you lose sight of because of all the other flakes. Just like Robin. There for a second then gone the next. Vanished like water vapor.

From this view you can see the entire city. Cy liked that. He could see the lights, the snow, the buildings. It was beautiful.

_Robin. Where are ya man? Were'd you go? What happened that night?_

Why was it always being left with questions? Why couldn't there be facts? Cyborg had hoped Robin would've left some...something for them. Like a note that says don't worry, i'm okay. A trail that says find me. A clue that leads to him. A little something to hold on to! Anything at all!

Cyborg let a snowflake fall into his hand. The heat form his body melted it in seconds. Robin the snowflake was right.

Cy watched as the sky cried frozen tears. He sighed. Maybe one day he himself would cry real ones.

**Meanwhile In Jump City...**

Starfire had decided a fly would be nice. Get her head cleared. Get Robin out of her mind for a few precious moments. Moments that she would be spending with him if it weren't for being such a horrible friend. Like everyone else, she hadn't talked about how she felt. She truly blamed herself for his missing self and hated herself for it.

Ever since Robin had been gone, Star lost the ability to fly. Her power were controlled by emotion. Flying was joy. Starfire now walked.

Walking was more like trudging, and trudging in the snow was cold, very cold. But she had become so numb to it and her mind wandered so far, she didn't even notice it. She had felt numb ever since she realized Robin was gone and was never coming back.

Star heard laughter, joyous laughter. She looked up. She felt a bit warmer. There were crowds of people. Happy faces, variety of warm food, little games. It was a celebration in the city.

Star wondered around. She didn't bring any money with her, but watching other people was just as fun as it would be for her to participate.

She kinda liked it. Reds and greens. Lights and sounds. It was nice. Joy was tangible. It was a feeling you could rip from the air and hold it in your heart.

Star had almost smiled a bit when her breath was knocked out of her in a sudden flash. A boy with black spiky hair, thin acrobatic body, stood right next to the carmel apples. "Robin?" She whispered.

The back of the boy. All she had to do. She..she'd...she'd found him! She'd found Robin.

For the first time in a long while she flew, flew right to him. "Robin! I-" The boy turned.

Her breath. Gone again. This boy wasn't Robin.

The back of this guys head looked like him, but the front was nothing like him. She could tell. Completely different.

Th boy looked confused as the Tamerinian went to the ground and stared at the boy almost horrified and saddened but mostly in shock an awe. The boy then awkwardly smiled and then his eyes lit up and his smile became more genuine.

"Your Starfire, right? Of the Teen Titans? Wow!" _Not Robin, sounds nothing like Robin. Looks nothing like Robin. Not Robin. Robin. _He went off about something and Star snapped back into reality when a girl with black hair came by and kissed the boy on the cheek.

"Hey, Rose! This is-" The boy pointed to nothing. That girl was gone. "Huh? Where'd she go?"

Starfire ran off from the party and into the alleyway. She fell to her knees in tears.

"Whats a beautiful broad like yourself doing out here all alone?" A voice asked. Star looked up at a familiar man. "You? Well, hey. Everyone needs someone on Christmas. How are you, Starfire?"

Starfire stood tall, her eyes glowing green. "X!" She screamed.

Red X held his arms in the air. "Hey! Truce! It's Christmas! I'm playing good boy today. Not that i'm gonna dress up like Santa or anything."

"Why are you here?"

"I live here?" He shrugged. "What's your damage your glowing like Rudolph's nose only green."

Star relaxed and frowned. "I am sorry. I just-"

"Not in the Christmas spirit. Were the other titans?"

"Cyborg and Raven are at the tower. I have no idea where Beast Boy went. Not that it's any of your business." She snapped.

"Very grouchy today, Scrooge. What about bird boy?" He asked.

Star seemed sad, angry, and something else Red X found attractive yet scary at the same time.

"Did he leave you guys or something?"

"Robin would never!-"

"Come to think of it no one has seen him in a while. Did he go back to Gotham? Or he leave Jump? Is he dead?"

Starfire threw a star bolt at him, which he dodged. But X learned not to ask about Robin. "I get it, I get it, Grinch. Robin's a touchy subject were not discussing."

Star sat in the snow. She buried her face in her knees and refused to look at X.

"You like him, don't you?"

"He's my friend!" She yelled at him.

X remained cool headed. "You know what I mean." He looked to the falling snow. Starfire remained looking at the fallen snow. "I'm sorry." He said.

"What?" She asked looking up at him.

"I understand whats it's like. Losing someone you love. It hurts. Hurts even worse when you don't let go."

Star looked down again. "He isn't dead. He's missing."

"Sucks, man. Not knowing."

"So I have to keep holding on. Because one day, i'll find him." X could swear a smile crossed her lips.

"I hope you do. I-I know you will." He said. Star looked up at him. "If anyone can do the impossible, it's goody-goody superheroes like the titans. If anyone can live trough the unlivable, it's Robin. Trust me. He'll be fine. You'll find him one day. Maybe even before next Christmas."

Star smiled. Her rosy cheeks made X blush behind his mask. X looked away and Star smiled and looked up at the sky.

"There you go!" He cheered.

"Go what?"

"You looked up at the sky."

"So?"

"You looked down a minute ago, at the snow that already fell. Living in the past. But now you're looking up, to the future." Star started at X blankly, not knowing what to say. "Cheesy?"

Star shook her head. "I understand. Thank you, X." She said standing up.

X waved and was off. Star stared at the graying sky. The cold biting at her nose. She pulled her jacked closer and buried her face in her scarf. And for the first time in almost a year she flew home.


	3. Chapter 2

((((( Hellllloooooooooo! Time for the boring author's note no 1 will read! Wahooo!Thank u reader for ur time! Special thanks to **FudoTwin17 **and **teen titan 99**! U rock! I love autumn, beautiful time of the year. Most wonderful. I do hope u enjoy the story! Don't be shy, go ahead n write a review! Please...please? Pretty please with sprinkles and gummy bears on top? :3...okay so ANTYWAY! On with the story! Keep readin my loves! )))))

Terra lunged forward, shifting her weight, strategically calculating ever variable. Her breath, her movement, the environment. Everything was precise, everything was perfect. She put all her power in her fist and gave it her all. Af if by magic a sudden gush of wind left her, her feet caved under her, and she was left on her backside staring up at the ceiling.

Her blonde hair strayed in her face. Normally when she was left defeated she'd glare at her opponent with those crystal blue eyes. But this time was different. She'd done everything right, everything perfect. How could she have possibly lost?

Her opponent reached out his hand, black hair messy and baby blue eyes shining back at her. "If you continue to gawk at me, I might think you have a crush on me!" He joked.

Terra shook her head and helped herself up. "Yeah, right! In your dreams, maybe!" As she brushed her backside off the boy laughed. The boy before her was going to be sixteen soon. He considered himself sixteen, but he really wasn't. He just told everyone he was. Well, would tell everyone. Everyone he was allowed to speak to. Unless he was supposed to older for a "job".

It'd been almost a year now since she'd been working with him, but it seemed like a lifetime. He was thin, not scrawny, but more acrobatic. Muscular and he clearly worked out regularly. He had a kind face and his black hair was always messy but it worked. He was handsome, thats for sure. Especially without a mask or anything. His entire face was _very_ handsome. He was one of those guys that girls would flock to and flirt with if he were allowed to go to school. He didn't g to the same school she did, he was "home-schooled". She might've had a crush on this boy if it weren't for two factors. One being she had her eyes set on someone else, two being his eyes. Yes, they were beautiful eyes. Some of the most beautiful eyes she'd ever seen. But they were harsh. Two piercing bullets through your soul. Every time she looked into them she felt a hole in her heart tug tighter against her chest.

"How'd you win? I calculated everything. It was a perfect attack!" Terra asked.

The boy shrugged. "It was a good attack, but it wasn't perfect," he said. "There isn't a perfect attack, everyone had a weak point. You would've gotten me if it weren't for the fact I knew a certain attack would stop you."

After a silence she became curious to know. "Well? What was it?"

He mocked her position. "See, you had a good stance. But you misplaced your power. You put all your power in your fist, that makes your legs weaker. You focused on your upper-body instead of your full body. That made your legs easily knocked down," he explained.

Terra nodded. "I see. You could you have known my legs were weakened?"

The boy smiled. "I didn't. I guessed. I know you, Terra. I have lived with you and he master for like I dunno forever?! I know when you make an attack you give it all you got up focus your energy into one area. Not bad but...not good."

Terra sighed. "Well, looks like i've lost again."

"Don't feel bad, Terra. I have had more extensive training than you." He said. She noticed he shivered a bit when he said extensive training. They both knew it wasn't just training. It was a beat down. A hard lesson learned. Terra hated watching her friend train with the master. He was ruthless and unforgiving. She lost every time to her friend and her friend lost every time to the master. It was true that the boy often put up good fights and lasted far longer than she or anyone else she'd seen him fight. But very few times had he even gotten close to winning.

"I feel a bit worse for you." She joked.

"Spare me!" He retaliated.

"Richard, Terra!" A voice called.

The teens looked to the darkness and their master rose from the shadows.

"Sir?" Richard asked.

"I've decided to work a job here in Jump. A big job."

"Why a big job?" Terra asked.

"To attract the attention of a certain group of heroes."

"Don't we usually avoid that?" Richard asked.

The master chuckled. "Indeed, apprentice. But this time i'm setting a trap. So I need to play the game. I want them to know i'm here."

"Why? Who are you luring?" Terra asked.

"The Teen Titians." He told them.

Terra's eyes widened. "But..master I-"

"Silence, Terra. Do you defy me? Have you actually gone off and gotten close to that changeling. Don't forget what they did to you."

Terra bowed her head and looked to the floor feeling sorry for herself. Richard raised a brow, not understanding. He looked to his master.

"Who are these Teen Titans?" He asked.

Terra felt that void tug at her. _My fault, my fault, my faul_t...

The man smiled, even though his masked covered it, he smiled because he felt like it. "Heroes soon to be ash. My plan will unravel soon. First we need a target. And as you know dear children,_ X_ marks the spot."

"Master Slade, do we-" Terra was stopped.

"Don't tell me you've gone and gotten yourself soft, Terra. Those little friends are yours just might get you in trouble if you don't behave."

With that Slade left his two apprentices in the dark. He was off to use a certain red thief to make his plan fall into place.

"Friends? You mean on the outside?" Richard asked. He'd never been outside on his own, a certainly not during the day or around normal civilians. He didn't know a lot of things about it. She'd tell him stories of it, and he liked to listen. But she never mentioned having friends before. Kayla and Madison were the two guardians at the school, but they were just two of Slade's lackey servants who made sure Terra or rather Tara did what she was meant to.

"Just the normal. Kayla and Maddie aren't really friends though. Not like us at least." Terra said quickly, avoiding eye contact.

"You're lying. I can tell! Who are these friends? Come on!" Richard was excited. He wanted to know everything.

Terra sighed. "I was aquatinted with the titans a long time ago. We used to be friends until they lied to me. Now, i'm supposed to destroy them. I have no problems with it."

"Except your friend is in the way of making this easy?"

"One of the titans is..different. He isn't like the rest."

Richard smiled, a cunning smile. A little devil smile that made Terra darken her expression a bit. The smile your little brother gets when its the I-know-something-you-don't situation which then is followed by a prank.

"What?" She asked, fearing the answer. Richard was like her little brother. Despite the fact he was older, stronger, and in truth smarter in the sense of battle and math and science, he was still none the less an on average immature boy. Therefore, little brother. He was protective of her. So he would act like an older brother at times. He'd listen, be there for her, and help her in tight spots. Their friendship was most definitely a brother-sister type.

"You like this guy, don't you? Yeah! Aw...Terra's gotta crush! Terra's got crush! Terra's got a-" Terra put her hand over his mouth to preventing him from chanting any further.

"Stop acting five!" She hissed. She removed her hand and her "brother" smiled back at her. "I maybe kinda sorta like him a tiny bit." She whispered. "BUT-" She said before Richard would start chanting again. "He's a titan. So it can never happen." She said.

Richard smiled, his five year old immatureness turned to his wise matureness. Richard was very wise indeed. When he wasn't training or messing with her, he studied. Math, science, literature, language, history, Chinese proverbs, poetry, anything he could get his hands on. The Haunt had an extensive library. Wintergreen often helped school Richard even though Slade was his true mentor.

"I can keep it a secret. You can tell me anything, you know." He smiled.

Terra smiled back. "Yeah I know."

"Sooooooo...what's his name?" Richard asked.

She blushed. "Beast Boy..."

Richard was silent. "Okay. Interesting. What are the other titan's names?"

"Let's see. Cyborg-"

"He a uh-"

"Cyborg? Yeah. Then there's Raven-"

"They have a pet bird?"

"No, a half demon girl."

"Wow, okay. Next."

"And Starfire-"

"Interesting name. Whats this Starfire do?"

"Alien girl."

"...and Beast Boy?"

"Changeling. He's green and can transform into any animal."

Silence.

"What?" Terra asked.

"I feel like were going up against a circus, not home dumb kiddie heroes!"

Terra laughed a bit while Richard stared blankly. "Who is the leader of the band of misfits?"

Terra was silent.

"What? Terra? What's wrong?"

"I suppose Cyborg is the leader now."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Their leader has been dead for almost a year now."

"Wow, poor sucker. What happened?"

"I killed him."

Silence again.

"Oaky- I see this is a stiff subject. So lets move n to something entirely and utterly different. Like...that math test coming up?"

"Oh my gosh, I completely forgot about that!"

**Meanwhile in Jump City Streets...**

It was that bad part of the city nobody goes to. Well, nobody who wants to live and keep their valuables anyway. The dark part of Jump, the place where heroes don't exist.

Derek Black was a fifteen year old guy living with a bunch of other orphaned kids. Many times Derek didn't know who it was that stayed up all night drinking or how many were doing drugs downstairs. People left and came when they pleased. An abandoned building is good for that. Even though most of the windows were smashed, the walls were beaten, the stairs were unstable, and his door was a torn up curtain he'd duct taped to the broken door henge it was his life and he was going to make the most of it.

For Derek, heroes weren't real. They were fake little goody-goodies who had a better life than himself because of something stupid. Being royalty from another planet, having robotic limbs, being a witch or whatever, having green skin, or what really got him hooping mad was having a rich daddy who let you have fun toys and made sure your friends were rich snot nosed superheroes too. Barf. What losers.

_Protecters of Jump City. What have heroes ever done for me? _It was true, Derek never had a hero grace him with their presence and mean it in a good way. He hated it. Heroes had done almost nothing for him. One hero had done one thing for him and in truth he didn't even do that. He sort of did it, but by accident. Derek was this heros mistake. Too bad he wouldn't be able to haunt him anymore.

Derek didn't hate Jump City, he didn't love it but he had no desire to destroy it. Jump was his hunting grounds. That was important. If he wanted to he could leave. But one thing kept him staying. Her. Lily. His "little sister". About five this year and a complete angel. His world. He'd do anything for his sister. Anything. Even though Lily hated stealing, it needed to be done. They were poor, too poor. Not that being poor wasn't something they couldn't deal with, it was worse. Lily was ill. Her disease would kill her one day unless he could pay off an operation to save her. So he'd "work" for the money. This hero helped him a bit. Not much, a bit. But he still owed him nothing.

Night. When the world sleeps. When the "adults" party. When the freaks come out. This is when Rex X owns the city. When Derek prowls the city. This is his jungle. He is the tiger.

He spotted a woman in town. Fluffy blonde hair, lots of jewelry, blonde in every single way possible. Not that blonde hair was bad, Lily was blonde. But the other blonde were the men drool and the girls become green with envy and the rich snobs lift their noses a bit higher. Innocent, maybe. Prey, yes.

X was gonna hit a major mark tonight. Before he leapt into action his cape was snagged back by an unforeseen hand.

Derek spun around and lunged. The man dodged every attack perfectly, worse, he wasn't even trying. He was mocking him! Derek fought harder, but with one blow he was knocked on his backside.

_ "_I don't want trouble!" He yelled.

The man laughed a bit. "Shame. I was hoping you'd be up for a job."

"Oh, a job, eh? What kind of job?"

"A big job. It involves the death of the titans and you becoming a rich man."

Derek thought about this. "I'm listening."

"Interested, are we? Good. I need you for a certain role. Can you play it?"

"Maybe. Depends. Why do you want to kill the titans?"

The man came out of the shadows. Orange and black armor, a mask with one eye showing, and _S _on his suit. Familiar. Very familiar. Derek had no idea this villain was the reason for Red X himself.

"Don't ask questions. Just listen. And i'll make that little sister of yours healthy again."

X went on the offensive. "How do you know about Lily?! What have you done to her?!"

"Relax, Derek Black. Lily is fine. I promise, I won't lay a finger on her."

"How do you know my name?"

"I know a lot of things."

Derek sighed. _He knows about Lily, about me. He also has money. But...the titans. All of them? Even..her? Starfire? No. I can't think about some girl over me and Lily. This..this is more important than some girl._

"Alright then. What's this job of yours?"

**Meanwhile in Titan Tower..**

The titans sat alone on the tower. Christmas may be over, but winter was not. In fact, the snowing was worse than ever. The peace had died down. Everything was mostly normal.

Raven hid in her room. All gloomy and reading her books and mediating. Acting like friends was the last thing she wanted to deal with. Acting like she din't care. Acting like Robin wasn't haunting her.

Beast Boy was out with Tara. When he wasn't with her he read comics, watched TV, and rarely enjoyed playing vide games with Cy. Rarely had become almost never.

Cyborg worked on anything machinery. He liked not thinking about anything but his work. For some time he created bots to scout for Robin. that dream had died. Now he just builds to build. To get his mind wondering to something else.

Starfire stopped cooking. She trained more. She took up a lot of Robin's old routines. In her subconscious she was trying to keep him alive. Sadly it was failing. She knew she wasn't Robin. Robin was dying, and now so was Starfire. She had killed them both. Often she wondered about going back home, but stayed in case Robin returned. But she was so close to the edge. A small wind would knock her off and send her flying to home planet.

Boredom. Not sadness, not anger, not madness, but pure boredom. The titans were bored. They weren't speaking, they weren't doing, they were barley being, no they just sat there, alone, bored.

Like a sudden flash the tower flashed red and a siren rang out. This hadn't happened in so long, the titans almost didn't know what to do. Cy had tried keeping the organized ways of Robin, but they all knew no one could replace their leader. Robin kept them up to date on drills and training. They were lacing, slacking, and becoming sloppy. They were losing respect and friendship. But the alarm still sounded. People still needed help. So then the titans went off to answer that call even if it meant losing everything, they'd always answer the call.


	4. Chapter 3

^^^Thanks **teen titan 99** and Aguna for ur kind reviews! Have a cookie! Oh n tt99, i get really random n weird ideas for stuff like all the time. I'll be sitting on the couch bored out of my mind and think hey u know what would be cool? this idea! But yes, i like the stories that don't just pull your heart or give it a tug but rip it out n cause a big bloody mess. More entertaining that way...wow i sound kinda morbid. But i like the extreme and non cliche stuff. I can't express 2 u how many fanfics ive read tat were to blunt w the romance, stuff that normally would never happen n was totally out of character. But i have respect for everyone...in some way. But i have learned from reading other hate comments if u dnt like something say nothig n move on because how much is ur time worth to make someone else's life miserable? Poor losers. But seriously, t**een titan 99** ur review made me smile so big my head almost exploded! XD So u rock for that! I never write long authors notes like these, but whatever very few people read them anyway probably. Thanks for reading and please enjoy n if u care to R&R! Keep readin my loves!^^^

**The Haunt...**

Richard often felt like a pet left behind in the house while his master went off to work. He always felt this way in the mornings of school weekdays. Terra would put on her uniform and get her stuff and go while he stood by the door watching her say goodbye and leaving him, in the dark, forced to make new plans.

He'd never liked to waste time. After his "sister" left, Master Slade would be out doing, well, something he wasn't allowed to know about, Wintergreen would be in the library. That meant after breakfast and some morning exercise, Richard would be off to the library himself. He often liked to silently read. Any book was a good book, and he read very quickly for someone of his age. Any age really. Wintergreen often marveled at the stack of books he could finished in just a few hours.

Although Slade was his master in martial arts and battle, Wintergreen was his mentor in two things outside of fighting. One being his teacher, he taught him math, literature, language, history, everything. Slade was right, this boy craved knowledge. Wintergreen, though impressed, feared this craving in the dark shadows of his mind. _This boy's hunger for knowledge can be dangerous, there is no telling what Slade could be filling his mind with. Richard, in time, could become a weapon himself. _

The older man sighed. He was with Richard in the extravagantly large library, reading silently. He did feel better after studies when the boy would mediate. He'd never seen the boy enraged or angry at anyone before. If he ever got stemmed, he'd go meditate. Though in battle, was a different story. True, not lead by rage or brute force but with cunning slyness of strategic advantage, Richard was able to practically "play" with his opponents. Entertained by their far lesser knowledge, he marveled at their incompetence, which to Wintergreen was the scariest thing of all. _This boy, if not taught property, could become one of the worst villains the world had never seen. A true horror._ This is why he taught the boy to meditate.

Richard also enjoyed a rather peculiar hobby for a boy, especially a boy of his age. Fighting, meditating, hungry for knowledge with the ability to absorb information like a sponge this boy was highly skilled in something else...cooking. True, Slade could get someone else to cook, and Terra had tried but she had to face it, she burned water. But Richard seemed to enjoy cooking, and was very skilled. It was a form of training to him, strategy, creativity, math and science all rolled into one. Sadly thats what he thought of it. Was anything "fun" to him anymore? Or was it all a lesson, a test?

There was one person whom he seemed to act at least partially human toward, and that's Terra. At one point, Wintergreen thought Richard may have had a crush on her, but he soon realized he just acts like an older brother to her. He liked to annoy her and play pranks or make sure he would go out of his way to make her aggravated just to see if he could, but he also cared for her, helped her with homework, listened to her, and was highly overprotective. Anyone who dared to mess with his "little sister", well, Wintergreen prayed softly that they wouldn't be dead when Richard was finished giving them his own lesson. Thats what Slade's "teaching" had made of him. He was a king boy, carless and seemingly immature..but it was an act. Wintergreen saw right through him. Inside this boy was barley anything less than a demonic teenager craving more than just knowledge but bloodshed. He'd seen it. He doesn't understand the concept of human emotion when he gets into a fight. Once he gets into battle he goes into a trace, a trace no one can pull him out of until he is done. This demonic force lives inside his heart, and Wintergreen could see it, he could see that this evil was not just tearing the boy apart but devouring his soul from the inside out. And soon, there'd be nothing left but an empty shell of a boy, there'd only be one thing left in this empty vessel.

Wintergreen in deep thought sat in his char, thinking to himself with a grave expression on his face. Richard felt a dark energy behind him. He turned around from his pot on the floor, a stack of books scattered around him and one nearly finished in his hands. He stared at Wintergreen, who was solemn, and then smiled at him. Wintergreen watched as the boy retuned to his book. He saw it coming. If Slade kept pushing him it would happen. There'd only be left a shell, in this shell a confused, psychotic, teenage killer made up of only rage and blood.

**Makurami High...**

It was one of those days when you know it's going to be completely and utterly boring. The clouds covering the sun were crying, their was a chill in the air, and Terra/ Tara hadn't gotten much sleep that night. The gloom of the day foreshowed a sleepy day in class, meaning she would mostly likely fall asleep during instruction time and be utterly embarrassed so she made it her top priority just to stay awake.

She hated leaving Richard alone with him, with Slade, all by himself. True, Wintergreen was there, but honestly that made no difference. Those blue eyes of hers seemed to look right through her.

During class, as predicted, Tara missed out on class but not because she was asleep, not fully. Her body was there but her mind wondered to the window and outside world soon to be swallowed by the inner thoughts of her hurricane of a subconscious.

_Richard. _One day he'd find out. His hungry mind would eat info and throw a clue smack in his face. He'd find a trail and he'd find questions and of course he'd find the answers to said questions. It was inevitable. He wouldn't take it, not after finding out who he really is. He'd want to leave. Master would never allow it and stop him, by force which will be necessary. Richard, the bird, would end up in a cage. Once more, only stronger. Slade would clip his wings. Worse than all of it, it'd be her fault. And they all knew it. He'd hate her for it, but no matter how much he hated her she'd always hate herself more.

**Titan Tower...**

All the titans were together in the main room. Normally this would be normal, but since the past year it hasn't happened since that night. Even more abnormal was that no one spoke. Not a single word. Bruised, battered, and drenched but most of all tired and confused and a bit angry. A serious look on all their faces, and they were all thinking the same thing.

Starfire closed her emerald eyes. She shut herself out for a moment, just a moment. Hoping the rain dripping off her hair would cover up the tear down her cheek, as she replayed what had just happened once more in her head.

_X had gotten ahead. Clever, very clever. He'd gotten much better since the last time the faced him. The only one close enough to get to him was..Robin._

_ But Robin wasn't there. It was just them. Star had watched as all her friends fell before X. They weren't dead, but temporally out of commission. _

_ It was up to her. She had to face X, she had to beat him. Robin...Robin..._

_ Her heart pounded as she ran across the roofs of the buildings. He then disappeared into the ally way. Star looked down and saw nothing._

_ "Why don't you fly?" X called from behind her._

_ She whirled around, ready to attack when-_

_ "Why don't you fly, Starfire?" He asked._

_ Why did he care? Why was he doing this to her? Why? Why? Why? Did her heart pound when she was near him. She loves Robin! Robin!_

_ "My powers are controlled by my emotions." She told him._

_ "What emotion are you lacking?"_

_ "Joy."_

_ X was silent. "I see." He said. Starfire looked away. Lately X had been acting like a friend to her. Why? Why was he doing this? "Who took your joy?" He asked her._

_ Star looked up at him. She then felt her cheeks get red and stared back at the ground. I hate this! she said to herself._

_ "It was him, wasn't it? Robin took your joy when he died?"_

_ "He isn't dead!"_

_ "Right, just missing." Red X then took Star in his arms, too shocked to move she just stood there, blank. "Then..forget about him. Forget the titans. Come with me."_

Star opened her eyes. She was back in the tower. She'd refused and he had disappeared on her. But there was one thing he'd said before he left. He'd given her one tiny object that know was in the center of the titans.

"He's back." Cy repeated holding the tiny silver S in his hand. Lighting and thunder struck the world. A storm was brewing, a big storm.

"If Slade was returned, why show up now? What reason?" Raven asked.

"Robin?" Star whispered.

"Maybe it has something to do with that girl Tara?" Cyborg asked.

BB felt his ears get hot. Suddenly he thought of her, the girl he liked. No. If that monster wanted Tara, he'd have to go through him first!

"Star?" Cy asked.

Star remained looking a the ground.

"Starfire, you okay?" Beast Boy asked.

She looked up. "It's Robin. I can feel it! Slade's back because of Robin!"

Another strike of lightening. The orchestra played outside. It was like something out of a horror movie that only made tonight more dramatic than it needed to be. Dramatic? Try traumatic! One of hose it only goes from bad to worse situations.

"Star, I-" Cy stared.

"No! It has to be! Im certain." Star said.

"Okay, assuming Slade has Robin, why would X tell you?" Raven asked.

Star looked outside. "I'm not sure. I'm only sure of one thing a the moment. and thats that we must at all costs find Robin!"

With that the thunder and lightening rang off her words into the night, letting them echo in the other's ears. She was right, if Robin was alive and there they'd find him no matter what. At any cost, Starfire would find him. Even if it men losing her life.

**Gotham...**

It was a dark and stormy night in Gotham, and the Dark Knight still had work to do. Alfred was used to Bruce overworking himself far too often, but this was different. This involved Robin, his son. There is no telling what could have happened to the boy, but no matter what any one said he was not giving up.

He was the one who suggested letting go and assuming Robin was dead after the trail hadn't just become cold but had frozen over and shattered underneath them. But he was not letting go. If there was no ground he'd fly instead. Sadly, this only brought him a heartache, migraines, and awful nightmares. Losing his son was his worst fear come true. to make matters worse his boy was missing without a trace. The World's Greatest Detective had no luck, Batman came up short, Bruce Wayne couldn't do anything, the titans ere worthless...no. It was't their fault. It was his. All his fault. And he hated himself for it.

"Master Bruce?" Alfred came in.

Bruce Wayne stared at the screen. He was losing his mind. The screen was blank, but his thoughts were wild.

"Master Bruce?"

The Batman was in his own world, one were his son was still there with him. A haunting world. One with the good memories, the bad ones, and the ones that were downright touring to the point he knew he'd never sleep right again if he could never sleep again at all.

He thought of all his mistakes. All the pain he forced Robin to endure. Everything. He could barley take it.

He broke down and tried to force away the tears. Alfred tried helping him but he shunned him away. Bruce's nightmares haunted him second after horrid second. Every breath, every blink, every thought was pain and misery. And it was all his fault. He was so tired. He began to watch the world fade into darkness. Hoe long had he been like this? How long?

Just before he went into a deep slumber he thought of every wrong thing he;d done in his life. All is mistakes. His only regret? Everything.


	5. Chapter 4

**Hello my lovelies! Sorry I took forever to post a new chapter. I just got overworked with high school, drama (both with people and the class), other crap, I didn't forget so don't fret if you like the story or have any critiques (and yes I know about the grammar and punctuation I don't always cheek back and find all my mistakes so no need to post it in my face) but just tell me if you liked it, didn't like it and tell me why. That would be very much appreciated. Above all please enjoy the story! Keep readin my loves!**

The sun was shining, but the weather was not so warm. Its that dead of winter where even though it can be as sunny as a hot summer day where you can cook eggs on the sidewalk but the appearance of the outside lies and if you step outside in your bikini you'll freeze your butt off and every other exposed part of you for that matter. So your left to wear a sweater and a fluffy pair of earmuffs wondering if its cold enough to snow why doesn't mother nature go ahead and do it already? Come on! We're waiting!

It seemed like the perfect day to go hang with your best friends, or take your girlfriend out, or go to the park and have a nice walk with someone you care about. Yet with all those absolutely delighting activities the titans chose the duller side of the coin and went out crime fighting instead. That's how a superhero spends a cold yet oddly sunny day perfect for park weather.

This had been the third time this week the titans had been called to a measly petty crime the cops were able to take care of before they got down to the scene.

The titans were left to do whatever it was they wanted to do just as long as it was not with each other. To Raven it was kinda funny. Not haha funny, but the kinda funny that makes you want to laugh out of pity. A laugh that makes you feel soulless. Robin was never thought of as the glue of the titans, in fact it seems it would be anyone but Robin as the glue.

Starfire had done everything she could to prevent drifting of the titans once before. Once she left, they broke apart. That was an alternative future. She alone was able to sew the friends back together. But after Robin left she lost that permanent cheerful smile. She lost the ability to keep everyone together.

Beast Boy was the funny guy. Always cheering others up. That not funny sense of humor and stupid grin always brightened everyone's day. But now he has put himself in solitude from the rest of the titans. He only visits that girl Tara.

Cyborg. Strong glue. The best friend, the shoulder to cry on, the rock, the man to see, BB's wingman, the expert on machines, the titan. He was good glue. Sadly no one wants any glue. He was the last to try. He keeps the titans able to stay together for two reasons. One, Jump may need superheroes one day. Two, Robin would've wanted it that way. Even now he works on his projects day and night. Taking over as leader was not as easy as Cy figured it might be. Leading was tough. Especially now. Cy wanted to give up, but in the deep part of his mind his thoughts kept him form breaking that promise to himself. The promise they made at Robin's funeral, the time everyone figured their was no point of return for their friend, the boy wonder. He closed his eyes, trying to hold back memories, but the flashback had already begun.

It was dark and cloudy. The sky cried heavy tears as the world seemed unhappy and in a daze. That was how it should've been. When good people die the world cries with them. That's how it is in the movies. That's the way comic books, stories, television that is what is supposed to happen. But instead the world must've not received the message. Apparently it needs a ground offering. Well, screw that too. Robin deserved rain at his death ceremony. It was only proper. He was a good man. He was a great leader. More importantly, he was a wonderful friend. He wasn't perfect, but no one is. Nonetheless it should have rained.

Instead it was sunny, mild weather. Warm with a gentle breeze. People would be laughing and smiling, licking ice cream cones and playing tag in the sprinklers. That wasn't fair. Thanks world, you just let your people down. You let a good man die without honorable rain.

Black. Black was supposed to be everywhere, but it was just what could be brought. Black clothes and black decorations. The sky was one of the prettiest shades of blue the titans ever saw. They hated that.

The service was long and emotionally exhausting. IF you've ever gone to a funeral, there pretty dull and boring. Soft tears and silent cries fill the air. The stench of harsh perfume and cleaner. The black, the black, and the black. The silence. That horrid silence when you feel like you should say something but instead let the emptiness eat away at your soul starting from the pit of your stomach up to the lob in your throat. Very boring unless you knew the person lying in that coffin. Sadly none of the boy's loved one's had the luxury of a coffin or a body for that matter. No closure. Only the guilt of not being able to say goodbye. Not in either life.

Instead a slab of rock with the name ROBIN was engraved. The titans figured that was not his real name, but Batman refused to give up his "son's" real name for whatever reason. Maybe for safety, maybe just because he could, or perhaps he hated the titans and wanted them so far in the dark the Dark Knight would laugh all the way home as they cried out in agony of not knowing what he knew. The luxury of ignorance. But Cyborg was smarter than that. He knew the reason. Batman, even though he told them to let go, was still holing on. He was going to keep searching in hopes he could take that slab of rock and chuck it into the ocean. Because-halleluiah!-his son was back.

Each of the titans had said words to Robin. Cyborg remembered his as if they were spoken to him that the soft wind that blew yesterday just before the storm.

He knelt by the grave and was silent for quite some time. He wanted to say the right words. Yeah, Cyborg knew when you die, you die. There is nothing else. The others might have a different belief, but he had his own as well. Yet still, in the light of the event, or rather the pitch black of it, he felt as if talking to this grey rock was somehow going to make the hurt go away. Even if it was his mind triggering this feeling, he felt the pain in his heart. Ever felt it? It burns. It burns not like fire, but like when you say something really mean and can't take it back so whenever you see that person all you can do it wonder to yourself _God what have I done? _Its in the pit of your stomach where when you have that floatly feeling just before you fall down below the tracks of that adrenaline pumping rollercoaster. But Cy stood still like the rook. Imagining he was stronger. Thinking the others wouldn't noticing he was hurting so bad. Hoping this pain would go away.

_I'm sorry I gave up on you, man. I know your alive, I just know it! But I have o let go, move on. If not for me, for the rest of the team. I'm gonna take care of 'em. I swear. I swear on this grave as long as it sits I will keep the titans together. I'm gonna try and make this hurt go away. I will miss you, buddy. I really will. But I have to go on._

He felt big thinking those words. Too bad he didn't say them aloud. Instead he just walked away and the hurt still burns. He hasn't been back since. Of all f them, even Raven, even Batman, Cy has yet to revisit his friend's grave. He felt like a hypocrite. Move on. If he'd moved on this pain wouldn't still be here! Would it? No, it wouldn't.

Cy opened his eyes and sighed. He hated this. He hated not having Robin, he hated losing his friends, he hated the situation, and he hated himself. He hated what he couldn't do. He wasn't man enough to move on and he wasn't human enough to cry.

**Raven's Room…**

No one likes pain. Pain is pain. How doe one describe pain? It's pain! Everyone had felt it, will feel it again, or might be feeling it right now! Pain is hated.

Pain is an element of black. It has no soul. It has no life. There is only agony. There is only despair. To the titans life had become this pain. A pain where the world was cast down from sunny skies and banished into dark unknowing pain. The city no longer needed them, they were, if anything, a burden. Without Robin they had lost sync in battle. Without Robin the titans had become a mess. Without Robin a lot of things had changed. This pain, this bloodthirsty pain, was in a lack of words awful. It was truly a living hell.

Raven was letting her emotions get in the way of her powers. Her mind was constantly screaming at her. _You killed him! It's your fault! He left because of you! He's dead because of you! He saved you and you were too weak to save him! To stupid! To ungrateful! Your fault! Your fault! Your fault! _

"No!" She harshly whispered to herself. "Please, don't! No more. I don't wanna hear it." _Your fault_ "No!"

You'd think screaming like she was her so-called "friends" would check up on her. Well, they had. For a while they tried to help her. She was just going crazy. The titans decided Raven was driving herself to the point of insanity, a fine point they all faced but her especially. Raven was fragile ice glass that melted in your hands and slipped through your fingers unless you were able to drop and shatters her soul first.

There had been scars left on her heart after Robin left. Scars time would never heal. She knew it. She hated it. In fact she loathed it with an undying passion that her friend was taken away mysteriously, never came back, and she could have stopped it if she hadn't been dumb and actually tried to be a good friend. She hated it. She hated herself. And the screams never stop.

**Jump City…**

Tara loved the cold. It was scarf weather. She liked it when the sun shined but the tip of your nose felt a gentle sway of icy blow. Jack Frost loves to visit Jump during this time of the year(Me: Aside from this story yes I am a Jack Frost Rise of the Guardians fan girl! But that's another fan fiction for another time. XD)

The sky had gone from sunny and chilly to angry grey skies that stormed into the city. Beast Boy liked cold weather, but he enjoyed warm weather best. Mainly because that was the time he could wear his "cool shades" and watch the girls stroll by in high heals and shorty shorts. If he went to the beach they'd be in mini shirts and cute sundresses with flip flops or sandals. Either way, they wouldn't have every inch of their skin covered up. Tara was a pretty girl and Beast Boy liked admiring her. But winter was the time for cuddling, so he couldn't quite complain.

"You cold, Tara?" Beast Boy asked as the cold air and his warm breath collided making smoke appear.

The blonde girl looked at her friend. Her hands were cupped around her mouth and she was blowing hot air into them.

"A little, but I'm fine."

Beast Boy smiled as he walked beside her. It was getting rather late, and Beast Boy needed to get Tara back home before dark and before the real cold set in. He honestly liked this life he had. Although his friend was dead, and the other missing, he found a new friend. She was without powers, without secrets, and the only danger she was going to get in was if she failed a test at school. Besides the regular dangers of living in Jump City, or living in any area, Tara was completely safe from villains that would want to kill her, train her, or take her away from him.

He felt normal with her. Like this was his girlfriend, he was a normal human boy, they had gone out for the day and he was walking her home, tomorrow they'd see each other in school and he'd walk her to class, there they'd get in trouble for P.D.A and all her friends would fan over their relationship, he'd have normal guy friends and maybe be on a sports team, he'd only have to worry about would be his parents, his social life, and making good enough grades to pass the class and stay on the team while she'd pass with fling colors, he'd knock a few jerks to the ground for flirting with her, he'd meet her parents, he'd take her to prom, they'd graduate high school, they'd go to college, they'd get married, get jobs, have kids and their kids would repeat history all over again. Sadly this would never happen all because of the fact that he was not a sports hero but a superhero, one with super powers and super enemies. The only danger to Tara was Beast Boy.

Beast Boy swore he'd protect his friend. He swore he'd try to be normal for her. But he knew deep inside she'd meet some other guy and fall for him. That long line of the future history wouldn't be his to share with her, but someone else's.

As light snow flurries began to fall from the greying clouds. A few white flakes landed on Tara's hair. Just before she walked in her home in the city she turned to her green friend.

"Thanks again for walking me home, Beast Boy." She said.

"No problem," he said. "I love spending time with you, Tara."

Tara blushed a bit which made him blush. He knew his blushing was visible despite his green skin. He felt it in his hot ears. Tara felt warmth on her cheeks.

"Me too. So I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world."

With that the girl with the blonde hair shut the door behind her leaving Beast Boy still smiling and letting the snowflakes fall.

**The Haunt…**

"AGH!" A boy with black spiked hair fell on his face for the fifth time. He'd barley seen that foot come at him, and suddenly it had landed in his gut.

While on the ground he took the initiative. His enemy thought he was down, so make him fall. He swiped his leg, trying to sweep his enemy off his feet but he had predicted this move.

His enemy flipped backward, landing perfectly and side stepped his feet, somehow managing to get behind the boy just as he stood up again. But the boy predicted this.

He ducked and a hand flew over his head. The boy used his elbow to send a sharp hit into his opponents gut then as the man faltered he kicked him for the final blow yet as his leg arched back, a hand stopped him.

The man took the boy's leg and used it to set him off balance, in the process regaining his own. The boy was now on his back with his left leg raised above him in the air.

He felt the hot sweat on his forehead suddenly turn cold. The fear rose into him and stuck him like a throne. He knew the impact of what was coming next. He'd be thrown back, hard, landing on the firm ground and he'd be temporarily out of commission. With force the taller man put power into the back of his arm and into his solders His swing threw his much smaller, thinner, aerodynamic opponent into the air.

For a split second the world stopped. Everything was still. His hearing was dulled. The feeling of being thrown, of being temporarily flying, was replaced with stationary fear. He felt the sudden arch of his back and then the collision of the floor would know his fragile bones.

Then the bird fell. He hit the ground. The breath was forced out of his, leaving him to feel the ultimate pain of the death of pride. His feathers were falling off, slowly, leaving without a way to fly from the cage and break free from the nest.

There was a sharp pain in his spine that spread throughout his nerves and making his entire body spaz.

The boy gasped and let air suck into his lungs. His first instinct was to screw the pain and stand up to fight. A foot on his chest stopped him. The air he worked so hard for left him again and the pressure from the boot that sent all its power onto his stomach. It was rather painful and as he felt his joints popped he felt he could hear every single thing. The sudden sharp breath before his scream, the silent breath the man took before the hit, the sound of the cracks, the impact noise, everything.

The foot left him. He rolled on his stomach, determined to fight, but he was so weak. His muscles were sore, his mind was tired, and all he wanted right now was a hot shower and a nap. But he had unfinished business. In this moment, he had to show him he was stronger than this. At least one more great move, a few more minutes, just a little bit longer. He had to hold on just a little bit longer.

He forced himself to stand. He knew he was vey weak so he only could make one move and he had to make it count. As his opponent lunged in for another attack, the boy used a side-step maneuver to quickly dart to the other side of his opponent and he used his leg to kick the man in his back.

This forced his enemy to falter and while he was off balance it was time for the kill move. He leapt into the air and was ready to kick. He needed a lot of power, that required momentum. He flipped in the air and then put all his power into his right leg. His foot came into contact with his enemy's back and as it did he quickly leapt off and tried to flip back and land on his feet.

His enemy was quick and he turned as he fell, using the boy as a means to gain balance, he forced the child to the floor and the kid felt the impact of his move. His own attack turned on him.

He was done. He had grown weak and he was exhausted. His vision became blurry. He wasn't able to think clearly. The world felt like a dizzy ship rocking and swirling. He let his head rest on the floor. The lights of many colors, the spots in his head, slowly became to fade into dark blackness. He let himself go under feeling his sense of pride die a little inside him One last thought_. I'll win next time. Just you watch! I won't be a loser forever! I promise! _

Slade stood over his apprentice. He had gotten much better, he though as he wiped the sweat form his brow. He actually managed to put up a pretty good fight. Someday he might actually be able to prove a formidable challenge.

"I promise I'll get stronger. I won't lose forever. Just…you…..watch…-" His opponent had the strength to say that last sentence before going under.

He was no child, he was becoming a young man. Slade was rather impressed, and he couldn't push away his sense of pride. No wonder Batman had done this, it was, in its own way, kinda…fun.

There was only one big drawback. Being so fatherly, being a mentor, to both his apprentices, was making him soft. He had to keep his ruthlessness. He couldn't never let feelings get in the way of his work. If it came down to it, Slade knew Batman wouldn't have given anything to save his son's life. Give up being Batman, give up Wayne Industries, give away his secret identity, preform misdeeds, or even give up his own life. Slade had to make sure he'd never do that. If it came down to it, and Dick was in that situation, Slade knew he' have to let him die. Tara was the same. Wintergreen would be the same, but he could easily handle himself. Now there is a formidable opponent. In fact, Slade might actually lose a fight with him. Slade began to walk away when a voice stopped him.

"So, you're just going to leave the boy there?" Speak of the devil.

"Wintergreen." Slade said in his usual elongated way. "You've been rather quiet these past days. We haven't chatted in a while."

"He trusts you. You've played with fire, Slade." Wintergreen told him.

Slade thought about this. He got what he wanted. He felt no regrets. So why did this situation make him…uncomfortable?

"I have no regrets," he said. "One can play with fire if he knows the tricks."

"Fire is very dangerous."

"Takes one to know one. I look at that boy, and in a way I see myself before…." Slade paused. "Besides. One can master fire if he tries." With that the men left Richard on the ground to awaken to the world of dark, unforgiving, pain and soreness. One more crack left in his soul. Even though it may just be "one more crack", cracks can ad up, meet at a weak point, and shatter the entire thing.

Makurami High….

Tara never liked lying to Richard. She could lie to most anyone and not feel a shred of guilt. But there were certain people that…well…she just looked in their eyed and she just hated herself.

Actually only five people in her life made her regret anything, two of them she felt guilt for. The titans were her friends. And she betrayed them.

They had done nothing to deserve it, but she stabbed them in the back. She was so full of delicate cracks that one , simple, small tap and the entire picture could shatter in your hands.

Whenever she looked at Richard she saw Robin. Despite the belief she had killed all his friends, despite knowing she turned around and sold the titans to Slade, despite becoming the apprentice to his worst enemy Robin reached out to her. Richard was the same. No matter what Slade did to him, that boy, her friend, would always be in there. He'd always have the heart of a hero.

It was whenever she looked at him, into those beautiful blue eyes that put her own to shame, she felt a hole in her heart. A gaping pit in her stomach opened up. Pain shocked her core. Guilt consumed her soul. All this agony she was going through, and she put herself there. She could undo it, if she wanted. She could turn off those feelings, if she wanted to. But she didn't. Why? Why on earth wouldn't she? Perhaps it was simpler than thought at first. Maybe Tara, the lost soul, was punishing herself.

Then there was Beast Boy. In the past few months he had become her best friend. Scratch that, he became Tara's best friend. Terra was just a lost cause, a far away dream, a haunting nightmare, an impure thought, and a lousy past memory of a worthless so called friend.

But he made her feel right inside. He made her troubles forgotten, her past not mattering to her, the world seemed kinder and warmer, and the future seemed brighter all of a sudden. Then when she walked away, like she always does in the end, the pain and realization sets in and that's when the nightmares come.

Poor Terra was falling apart. Well, in reality she wasn't falling apart. The cracks Slade had put in her soul were slowly getting bigger, and bigger, and bigger. Very soon she herself would not just crack, but utterly shatter into a million unfixable pieces. Once that happened there'd be no going back. She'd be gone. Nothing more than an empty shell. A body without a soul. Half dead.

What is worse than death? What is more painful than living? The pain of being both. Dying in mind but living in body. That is when a person's world turns on them and there is only agony and misery left. Only the pain, only the darkness, only the guilt, and it will be all her fault.

_You little liar. How can you possibly live with yourself? Honestly, how can you look him in the eyes after what you've done? How can you keep talking to that other one, the green child, after all you've put him through? You're worthless. Pathetic. A low life that needs to just disappear. No one needs you. No one wants you. _

_ "You've been lying to me all this time. I hate you! You're not worthy of being in the same hemisphere as me let alone calling me your friend! I can't believe it! Pathetic! I can't look at you anymore!"_

"Beast Boy…no…"

_ "It was all a lie. My entire life. A lie. And it's your fault. It's all your fault! How could you look at me everyday and smile like nothing was wrong? How can you be so heartless! I thought we were friends! I HATE YOU!"_

"Richard…Robin…I..I..i'm sorry…"

_ "Go die!"_

_ "Pathetic."_

_ "Worthless!"_

_ "I can't even look at you!"_

_ "Liar."_

_ "I HATE YOU!"_

_**RRRRRRIIIINNNNNNGGGGGG**_

"NO!" Terra awoke in a cold sweat. The words still echoed in her mind. That evil conscience. Beast Boy and Robin too. Their words stung her, and she still felt it. It was so real, but such a nightmare.

"Mrs. Markov. I assume you do not know the answer then? There was no need to shout. A simple no ma'am would have sufficed."

The class giggled as Tara sunk back in her seat and blushed. She awoke form one nightmare and entered another. Math class.

She wanted to pay attention, and tried not to dose off or daydream but it always come back to the same old, same old.

Tara looked out the window and watched the angry grey clouds swarm the sky and shed hard tears reflected by the pitter patter from the window pane. She truly felt pain looking out that window.

"I HATE YOU!"

Terra couldn't help but let a small tear fall. She tried to hold it in, and when a friend asked she brushed it off and blamed that she was allergic to the dust in the classroom although Mrs. Sprat keeps her class sparkling clean thank you very much.

_Robin. Hate me. Why don't you really hate me? Please! Please, I deserve it! HATE ME! _

She had done things truly unforgiveable so she took the punishment of a living hell as it was the least she could do, but also the most she could do for those she wished she could call her friends. She could never wish for Beast Boy to hate her. It was just impossible. But for some reason she begged Robin to hate her in her mind. Why? Why him? What was it?

_I HATE- I'm going to give you a second chance-were friends, right?- You're my friend, Terra- Best friends, always-I'm always going to be here for you-I'd even lose my life, if it meant you came out of everything okay-were in this together-I could never hate you, you're my best friend. _

Over the time she knew him, Richard and Robin had said those words to her. He reached into the pit Terra had fallen into to help her get out. But in order to atone for her sins she believed staying n the dark pit made up for it. She knew thinking that was also a sin, but she couldn't bring herself to do anything but.

Now she was breaking. Although she had hands to mend her, she would go on resisting assistance. In a way, far into the darkest crevasse of her mind, Terra wanted to die. She wanted to waste away in agony.

_Richard._ A tear began sliding down her cheek. Her body was shaking. _Hate me. I don't understand why you are being so nice, even when you knew I wa bad! Why are you being so nice to me? Why are you reaching out for me? I don't deserve it. Please. I want you to hate me. I need you to hate me. Hate me, please. Hate me. Hate me! HATE ME! _

Terra couldn't hold it in any longer. The tears began slipping form her grasp and demanding she cry. _RICHARD_! She immediately ran out of the class and into the girls' bathroom. She closed herself in a stall, went into the corner, and slowly sank to the floor. She threw her head over her knees and shielded her face. There, in the girls restroom, stall 3 furthest from the door, of Makurami High, Terra, the glass girl, began to cry…. she began to crack…and soon after a crack there is a shatter.


	6. Chapter 5

~HELLOOOOO FANFICTIONERS! So here's the latest on yours truly and the story as well as my other fanfics. I plan on continuing my other teen titans fanfiction Colder and Colder and if you have a better title please tell me! Also I plan on making another fanfiction for teen titans as well as other cartoons like adventure time. So if you like my writings check em out. I am sorry I don't update frequently but with school, drama, music, homework, and the sudden reason I have to get glasses makes life really hard to fit in internet time for fanfiction writing but the more reviews I get the faster the story's next chapter arrives! BTW I loved you guys' reviews they made me smile! ^^ Enjoy and remember to keep readin' my loves!~

It was mid winter and a biter cold that stings your nose. It was just like last year. The titans had no idea how old Robin was, but it was the second year of his disappearance. The boy was fifteen when he disappeared, being born on the first day of spring he turned sixteen rather soon, soon his birthday would arrive and he'd be seventeen. But on this day of last year Robin Boy Wonder went out for a ride on the R Cycle and never came back.

He just up and disappeared. Poof! Gone like the wind. Or was it gone with the wind? It was more than wind, it was a chill that whisked the exposed parts of your skin even when that harsh blow of sudden bitter freezing ice did more than a nip at your nose, which was more like an angry mauling, and it sent you diving for warmth by any means. Even if it meant snuggling close to a green skin changing to which the only reason you're even supposed to be with him is to keep an eye out for his so called friends so they stick with her master's plan. The plan was not to toy with his emotions. But the worst is what you did to his friend, your friend, no, he isn't your friend because you don't have the right to call him that after what you've done.

The memories returned for everyone. Like a painful black spot you get with bad headaches and your vision gets dull so you sit down for a while but it just gets worse. Suddenly your heart starts hurting, a harsh pounding and stabbing pain, a pit in your stomach opens for not the peaceful butterflies but the whirlwinds of the hurricane that just mated with a tornado. So a certain gothic girl tried meditating but it just never worked and the memories flooded inside her.

The entire episode arrived like a bad storm. A storm that might get your gears rusty, but there is no way you'd let the rest of the team know how badly you are hurting. So its best to act like it doesn't faze you. You only let the part of missing a friendship make a slight light through a dark cave of all the emotions your feeling.

Even though you're with her, you still miss your best friend. You can't help but think about your last words, how you said them in spite. How he was right, everything worked out, for you, while he just ended up dead or possibly worse.

Not knowing was the worst part. You're so depressed you can't even function properly. No longer able to fly. No longer able to cook foods no one will eat. You are no longer able to be you. Your soul is deteriorating; your slowly dying, and the pain won't stop.

For some, it is a neutral event. Yes, it would be nice to see the boy live his own life but why should you care. Your friend has already done the deed, why not just play along? True, it feels wrong, but remorse has never held you back before. Maybe if you stay quiet, shut up and color, all will eventually turn out okay. No. A boy's life has been taken away, forced on him, and ruined. You've been a part of it. Yet you still can't feel remorse. And when you don't pay attention, that voice reminds you that's the reason you hate you when you overthink too much.

It can be a victory. You completed your mission. Mostly, you've won. You don't feel regret. You don't feel sympathy. You just feel thrilled. You know you've won. Perhaps that is why you are so unsatisfied.

But for one it is unknowing. Everyone is quiet, even the city people, though you've never been outside during the day to know. All you know is everyone is quiet, they speak to you less than normal, and Terra has trouble looking at you right. It's like a sad holiday, a memorial, a memoir of some sort that no one lets you in on; a secret of a sort. A time when your memory was blank. You only know what Terra, Wintergreen, and your master were willing to tell you. You remember logic, you know how to fight,; you've just forgotten the sentimental parts of life including memory and who you are.

The titans, Slade, Wintergreen, Terra, and even Richard have a feeling this day. It is rather strange. The titans may have different opinions on what happened to Robin, but the remember him. They go to his grave and there they have a moment to remember. Then when they leave they hope to remember to try and forget. Its all black, and Richard never knew where Terra went off too. Well he did, but he wondered how it felt being there. A friend of hers dies by her own hand. She said she had to kill him, and only Wintergreen, Slade, Terra, and himself know she killed this boy. He died at fifteen.

She wears a black dress, a pretty one, but maybe it is supposed to make her look beautiful so that way even when everyone is crying, at lest her beauty is there to make them smile a little inside and slowly begin to heal the pain. Sadly she doesn't get this healing, for she doesn't know how beautiful she really is. And lord is she beautiful. Not the pretty people say to not hurt your feelings or that trashy sexy, no true beauty. A rare beautiful people just sit back breathless and think to themselves, _wow_.

Richard knew not of how long the even lasted, how the event occurred, how many or who would be there, or the name of the dead boy. He only knew what Terra had said to him just before she left for this event. The girl is walking to this event right now. She heard the wind blowing, howling against her ears. A sharp cry of agony awaits her. Her head begins to throb, the memories return. Even when she doesn't close her eyes the flashback comes, so she decides to close them anyway.

"What are you wearing?"

"It's a dress"

"Obviously. Why?"

"I'm going somewhere?"

"OOOOO" The boy said intrigued. "Is it with that boy?" He made sure to sound a little annoying, like a gossip girl.

"Yes, he'll be there."

"Where you going? And why wear all black? Add a little color! Try red." After a while he noticed the melancholy look in her eyes. Completely serious and very depressed. A sober state that seemed to even made himself sad. "Hey….what's wrong? I thought you'd be happy to be going to a party with your boyfriend."

"It isn't a party. And he's not my boyfriend." She said softly.

"It must not be for you to look like that, and you didn't even yell at me for calling that mystery dude of yours your boyfriend. So what is this shindig?"

"It's a memorial service, for a hero. "

"A memoir? For a hero? Who died?" Richard paused. "Why are you going again? I think I missed the part when you went completely insane! Helloooo, Terra? We're kinda in the hero killing business."

"Not this time. He was my friend before he died."

"A hero? You were actually friends with a-"

"I wasn't always Slade's apprentice. Back then, I thought I could be something different. But I was wrong. My mistake ended up killing my friend."

"How'd he die?"

"I killed him."

Silence. So that was the reason. A friend, a hero, and the murder of said hero friend by her own hands. Richard noticed Terra tensing up, her body was shaking. An odd sound escaped her lips. Like a sqeakish quiver.

"Terra? You okay?'

"If he only would've hated me. He'd still be here. Now I'm forced to go to his grave and sit there while everyone just asks why and I'm the reason, Richard. I'm the reason why he had to die! It's all my fault!"

She began to cry and Richard rushed to her side.

"Hey, hey, hey now. Shhhhhh." He held her as she wept in his chest. "It isn't you fault. Things like that just happen. I'm sure you did what you had to. And you know what? I bet it was the right thing." She wept harder. "I think the reason why he didn't hate was, well, because who can really hate you, Terra? Your smart, your pretty, your kind, gentle, and caring. You're the reason my world keeps truing. You're the reason I keep going. You're like my little sister but more. Terra, you're my best friend. I always be here for you, you know that, right? You're such a special person, Terra. Special to everyone. So I bet that's why he couldn't hate you. And who can blame him? So stop crying. You'll just make me cry and then we'll both be screwed." Terra looked up to see Richard smiling back at her. She stopped crying. He embraced her. "See. All better. I'm here for you, Terra." She closed her eyes. In that moment she couldn't hate herself, she just loved him. He was her rock, her best friend. He was a different love than Beast Boy, but he was still a big part of her life. So she wanted to be selfish. She wanted him to be there with her. Just before she pulled away to get ready he whispered one thing in her ear. "Forever and always."

As Terra opens her eyes she realizes that she and Beast Boy are already at the place where Robin was supposed to be buried. Now it was simply a grave marker without a body. In truth it was just a slab a stone. It was a form of closure. Closure meant letting go, but Terra knew what it really meant; it meant you quiet trying.

"So that was your friend?" Tara asked. It was weird stepping into one girl and then another. In her heart and mind she was Terra, to Richard and Slade she was Terra, to the rest of the world and especially the titans she was Tara, a simple school-girl.

"Yeah." Beast Boy said. Terra had never seen him more serious than the look he had right then. "That was my friend."

It was all quiet for a moment. One of those moments you feel like saying something but don't because it was probably stupid anyway and just let the person suffer in silence like you know they want to.

"It isn't fair. He's missing, not dead, at least not that we know of. But he isn't here. I can talk to this rock all day but it would only be a lie. I'd be talking to air. There isn't even a body under there. Just dirt. He isn't dirt. And even if he died he isn't there!" Tears began to fill BB's eyes. "I can't even apologize!"

"Apologize?"

BB sniffled. He wiped away the tears. "I lost my parents when I was young. Then I lost my girlfriend to this madman. She died saving us, saving me. She became a statue and I would visit her everyday. I'd talk to her. I knew she wasn't there but it helped. Then I meet you." He looked down at her and smiled. "You look just like her, Tara."

"She was Terra. So that's why you befriended me."

"Yeah." His smile faded. "Her statue disappeared and when I saw you I thought maybe she'd come back. It was the greatest feeling ever for a moment. Like someone you loved just came back form the dead. Then slowly I realized she was never coming back. The madman who killed her, the man who is responsible for all of this, he took her away from me. He tried doing the same to Robin. In a way, I guess he did. But after Terra was just gone I dunno. I lost it. My life at that moment, with everything that had happened, well I, I just couldn't take it. I had said things to Robin I really shouldn't have and then he just disappeared. I was so close to just going off the deep end. I almost lost myself in the darkness. Then I got to know you and…I feel like that hole inside me was healing."

He smiled at her and she found the courage to smile back. Terra tried to make herself understand she was the cause of his pain, but still because he was smiling she couldn't help but smile back. And as he held her in his arms she close her eyes and let herself feel relax and happy. She knew one day he'd find out everything. He'd hate her. His hate would be too much for her to bear and she'd die. Somehow it'd kill her. But right now, in this moment, she let the good feelings overtake her. She just hoped that moment wouldn't be soon. She wished she would stay like this forever. She prayed that perhaps Beast Boy would be the one to glue back her shattered remains. Yes, it was true. It was a selfish thought, but there's no harm in dreaming, right?

**The Haunt…**

Derek Black wasn't used to someone calling the shots. He was a simple thief who went by his own rules. He had grown up as an orphan. Alone in the streets he was raised only by his own rules.

Derek learned a lot about thieving from the streets. He became more than street smart. He was streetwise. When he heard about the goody-two-shoes Robin and the Red X incident he was more than intrigued.

He managed to use his talents to steal the Red X costume and then he meet the bird boy who wanted the suit back. After that X went on.

Now he stood in the haunt of the one called Slade. How long has it ben since that last Christmas Starfire told him Robin di…er…went missing? For a moment he was happy. The look in her eyes was a hopeful one filled with promise. Through her he saw a promising future. One without thieving, lies, betrayal, and hate. But it could never happen. Not after everything that's happened. Not with his past. Not with her future. It was too late to turn good, and too broken for one more mistake like that.

"X, I presume?" A girl with blonde hair and pretty blue eyes walked out from the shadows. Derek felt a flutter. Oh yeah, this'll be fun.

"Maybe. Depends on who is asking? And who might this lovely rose be?" He asked, trying to look cool and succeeding as far as any other girl would see. Derek was known for having a mysterious pull to him. Few people, people like the girl before him, were aware of this pull and were also ale to conjure it themselves as well as deflect any pull trying to suck them in.

"Careful, roses have thorns." She told him slowly making her way in front of him at a safe distance, of course.

X smiled, if it weren't for the mask he'd look a little decent with an innocent smile on his lips.

"No time for flirting. Strictly business here." A familiar voice said. X automatically felt defensive. He turned to see a boy probably around the same age as himself. An athletic build, spiky black hair, not as spiked as Robin's, speaking of Robin his voice….could it be? He couldn't be sure. After all their meetings were masquerades. They had a dance, a chat, and a face full of masks and lies to chew on while the spun each other in circles.

This boy couldn't be Robin. For one Robin was dead, right? Or cold he really be missing? But if he were, why stay in Jump? Besides the second reason is the true ringer. No way would Robin let anyone see his face. His mask covered his eyes. This boy had the most beautiful blue eyes he'd ever seen. It was like swimming in a sea of clear consciousness. He felt as if he cud tell this boy anything. He was his best friend. Suddenly the innocent stares and undisciplined smiles made Derek feel relaxed. Besides Robin can't smile anyway.

"I see you've welcomed our guest, Terra, Richard." A man said as he appeared form the shadows. X felt sudden chill that wasn't there before. The girl nodded.

"Yes, Master." The boy said.

Master? Creepy and kinda kinky if you asked X. No way he'd answer to any "master". He was his own master. Well, sure, maybe Lily kinda-sorta "wore the pants" in their "household" but Derek was the one who took care of her and plus he was never one to listen to anyone but Lily anyway. But this man had a certain command in his voice that Derek couldn't help but listen to and want to…no! This man did not control him! He couldn't go there! Not with Lily on the line. Do the job, get paid, save Lily, and burn the checklist and dance in its ashes.

"We have a manor of business to discuss, don't we, Mr. X?" The man Slade asked.

Derek looked at the girl Terra, who suddenly looked like her innocence had been swallowed and all she wanted was to dive in after it. A sad aura that made Derek feel defeated. Her looked at Richard. His childhood likeness went to a villainous smirk that gave off the feeling that even though he might regret it, it was going to be a fun ride. An addicting one at that. Once he started he wouldn't be able to stop…ever. But heck that is what a thief lives for. Why not? Derek then looked at Slade. He felt the pull drag him under, forcing him to dig a six foot pit. A test. Dig your own grave. If you fall in, if you can't get out, were not going to save you. If you manage to survive your pit will be filled with riches beyond imagining. He decided to take his chance with the grave riches. Derek's sly smile came through and although the mask covered his expression you somehow knew he was smirking. He looked directly at Slade and almost laughed in spite of himself.

Derek opened his mouth. He could walk away, he could turn it down. Or he could gamble. The only thing at stake? Everything. "Yes," he said. "I believe we do."

**Titan Tower…**

Cyborg stood alone in what used to the Teen Titan's living room. Now it was an empty space. Empty of people. It was just a room.

One fight was not unusual. It was never unusual, even with Robin. Just after he left the fights started hurting more and hitting home a little harder. Cy supposed it was just the last straw this time. Beast Boy was the first to vacate.

Beast Boy had become increasingly distant from the titans ever since Robin left. The titans knew it wasn't just because of Robin, but because of Terra and everything else they didn't know about.

After Beast Boy, Raven left. It was a surprise she wasn't the first to leave, but then again anyone leaving was a shock. So predictable but denial made you so blind that any surprise was a slap in the face.

Recently Star left. She used to talk to Cy, but then the conversations got shorter and the visits became farther apart and soon they rarely passed each other in their own home. Star got to the point she couldn't even look Cyborg in the eyes. One day she was just gone. Cy wasn't even sure when she'd left, but he just one day realized she was gone and she was never coming back, none of them were.

It was a few days he sat there on the couch, watching TV, all alone. Not knowing what he was watching, but he was just watching it. Then reality sunk in. All his friends were gone and he was acting like he didn't even care. He'd broken his promise to Robin and instead of getting off his metal rear he was sitting on a comfy couch when people in the city would very well be being attacked by a giant robot or whatever it was the titans used to fight.

The titans could very well be dead for all he knew. Just like Robin, he'd never know what happened. He even had a chance to save everything, several opportunities, and he let them slip through his fingers. Star was right there, with him, and he let her go. Raven stayed for a while, but he refused to try and save her from the swallowing darkness. BB was obviously going through an emotional tiff, but Cy never bothered to find out what it was. Robin wouldn't have done that. Leaders don't do that, at least not the good ones.

Robin would've found out what BB was going through and helped him, he would've saved Raven, and he being there would've been enough for Star. Cyborg wasn't Robin. In a way he was glad.

Robin also kept secrets; he kept close to the dark. He was a mystery, he was so much like Slade it was scary. Robin was often a good leader and a good friends but then again he wasn't.

Now he just up and disappeared. Slowly the titans faded as well. The city is going down, the criminal rate has gone up. The tower is looking old, Cy felt like crap, the world was graying….

God, what a mess.

If Robin were here he'd work until he fixed it or died. If only Robin were here. No. Cy had to fix things, by himself. He had to try. He owed it to Jump. He owed it to the titans. He owed it to Robin, but more importantly, he owed it to himself.

Cyborg rose up from the couch and discarded soda can pile, he looked out the window to see the sun rising and thought to himself _one day I'll fix it. One day this will all be just one big nightmare. One day, one day, one day….._

**Jump City Streets…**

They were obviously drunk. No one in their right mind pisses on the side of the street. Both of them were totally wasted. They were hunched over, they couldn't walk in a straight line, and their speech was slurred and made no sense.

They were laughing, but it wasn't a good laugh. It was that kind of laugh you hear and take your child close and tell them to pay no mind to those people and that we're going somewhere else and walk off way faster than normal to the point the small child knows something is wrong but is either to frightened to ask or in their own way knows they shouldn't.

It wasn't the best part of town, but now days, a lot of the streets were like that, especially at night. She couldn't have picked a worse time to be there.

She walked by herself, in a place people never walk alone. No one walks alone anymore. No one doesn't lock their cars anymore, no one doesn't turn their alarms on anymore, no one leaves their windows unbarred anymore, no one talks to strangers anymore, no one goes out at night anymore, and no one ever walks by a bar at night all alone especially if that someone is a tiny, pretty young lady.

The girl's hair was dark, about to her shoulders, and she was in dark clothing. Her outfit was tight fitting and she wore a cloak but her legs were completely shown. Her cloak had looked as though it'd been through a lot. Her eyes had dark circles under them. She was beaten, sore, and tried. She was walking close to the wall, very close, in fact she was leaning on the bricks as she walked through the streets aimlessly. Lost, cold, beaten, tired, and pretty. Very pretty. She was, in a way, what most would call, sexy.

When your drunk , if your lucky, your reality is dulled. So it really doesn't matter who you "hook up with" because one you wont remember and two your drunk. But any sober man could see this girl was worth hooking up with, that made two drunks an even worse situation.

She stuck close to the wall and let the drunks be well drunk. Hopefully they wouldn't see her. She felt so weak. Even with her gift she didn't think she'd be able to fight back very long.

She stopped. She stood there silently still. She tried to even her breathing, make it slower and more of a whisper. Shakily and louder than she wanted her breathing continued.

She tried walking when she felt a rush of air rise in her throat. _No_, she thought, _keep it in, keep it in, keep it_-

Two wasted men heard a hash coughing from the wall. They looked to see a very sexy little figure right for the taking.

"Hey, beautiful." One of them said.

They began walking over to her, she lowered her head and leaned against the wall. She couldn't run, she'd hurt her ankle a few days ago. She would've healed it by now if it weren't for the fact she was starving. She was so weak, she hadn't slept in a while. Tow days, right? Since her last nap. Food? Dunno, maybe three days? Four? Last drink was whatever was left in that soda can that guy threw at her.

One of the guys got real close, only inches from her face. His breath was sour. It made the girl want to puke, it took almost everything she had not to. If she threw up, she' get weak, if she got weak she'd pass out, if she passed out this with these drunk guys it'd all be over.

"How," the man swallowed hard, 'bout you..an…meee? Eh beautiful?" He smiled, a wicked smile, one where you see what he wants and to give in was weak.

If it weren't for hi being drunk he looked like a nice guy. A guy who would hold your hand when you were in the car, a guy who would tell you your pretty instead of grabbing our waist and jamming you against the lockers saying how sexy you are, a guy who makes you feel special. But alcohol dulled his everything, making him nothing more than a lusty monster.

"Get….away…from me…now." She said slowly. It took a lot of power just keep her eyes open let alone speak.

He stroked her head and she tuned away. He laughed; it amused him. He got in close, to kiss her, and she pushed him away and tried walking against the wall again. He laughed even harder and stumbled over to her. He caught up with her tried grabbing her, she broke free and fell to the ground. He laughed. He got closer to her, to finish what he started. The girl heard his friend laughing, edging him on.

"I said," she lowered her head, feeling a sudden rise in power. "Get….AWAY!" Her eyes became two black holes and the man felt himself being pushed back against the wall. He felt his bones crushed. His leg, oh God, his leg. She broke it! With her mind! He broke his leg! He looked down and saw his bone escaped from his flesh. He _saw_ his bone!

All the girl heard was a horrid scream, a scream of agony and pain. Confused turned into pain. Pleasure turned into pain. Pain was all that was left to think about.

"Witch! She broke my leg! She…she…..witch! Witch!"

The girl ran, she stumbled, she tripped, but she ran. Then a forceful object pressed her against the wall.

"Whatcha do to my friend, eh? He was just trying to have a little fun, right? Witch, you tried to kill 'em. Broke his leg, his bone came right out, didn't it?"

Her wrists were pinned to the wall, his body advanced on her. She was trapped. To weak to fight back. She couldn't call upon her powers. His breath was worse than the first guy. This guy wasn't a man but a loser who always got dunk and hooked up with women. Someone without a life, without a purpose, and without sense.

"I'm sorry. Please, just leave me alone." She whispered.

"Sorry don't fix his leg, sweetie. That's expensive, ya know. How you gonna pay me?"

"Please, I don't have any money."

He leaned in, really close. "That's alrigh' with me, beautiful."

The girl tried getting away but the man wrestled her to the ground. His hands went to her waist and began slowly feeling her up. His lips smashed themselves against her own, slowly getting lower, farther from her lips and closer to her-…_please…just get off…please just get him off of me..someone please…save me!_

He wasn't stopping, and he wasn't going to. He was going to take her tonight and she wouldn't be able to stop it.

The world began to blur and she felt herself begin pulled into darkness. She would pass out and he was going to-NO! She wanted to scream. She wanted to get this horrible excuse of a man off her. She wanted to be saved! _Save me! Somebody, anybody! Please! Cyborg? Starfire? Beast Boy? ROBIN_!

An agile figure kicked the man off her. The girl laid there..,on the ground. She saw a familiar figure, one built for acrobatics, very agile. She saw him save her. The man was easily subdued. Now he was against the wall. Blood escaped from his nose and lower lip. He'd have that black eye for awhile. Her savior looked the drunkard in the eye, for a moment he felt sober, sober enough to be so frightened he pissed his pants.

"Now you listen real good. Don't you ever touch this woman, or any other woman, ever again, you rotten piece of wasted garbage!" Her savior threw the man to the ground and spat at him. "You make me sick." The man stumbled to his feet. Her savior threw him against the wall once more. "And if I ever see you ever again," he leaned inches form the man's face, close enough to smell the spearmint gum he recently discarded, right in his ear he whispered to him, "'cause if I do I'll kick you so hard you'll have absolutely no way to ever have any "fun" with your "junk" ever again, you hear. In fact, you just might become a little damsel in distress yourself if you get what I'm saying." He threw the man again and he ran off stumbling. "Get lost, scum!" The man said as the drunkard faded in the distance.

The girl's savior rushed to her side. He picked up her head and shook her, trying to keep her awake.

"Raven? Raven! Raven, are you okay? Speak to me!" He yelled.

Raven looked up at the man, familiar. She knew him. The mask, he had a mask. As the world began fading as it began to blur she realized who her savior was.

She whispered, but he heard her clearly. She looked at him with sad yet hopeful eyes. Her mouth opened slightly, she took in a bit of air and let it out to say one word, "Robin?"

**Jump City Streets….**

It was daytime, and the people were out. It was nice to be out. Starfire looked tired but much better than you'd expect. She was still in her titan uniform, she was still broke, and she was still alone.

She walked without a point, without a clue. She had been on her own for several days maybe weeks, who knows? She managed to eat for her first few days on her own from boys she meet on the streets who bought her a muffin, pretzel, or cupcake from one of the side stores in the city.

Finally she found somewhere to stay. She spent her nights at a church where the priest took pity on her. He allowed her to stay and in return she helped clean the church. She washed the floors, walls, dusted the high places. Even with everything that had happened she could feel a sense of happiness there. It was so relaxing, so peaceful. The pastor was so kind and the people who came in were so kind. Star liked the church very much. It was very old but very beautiful.

She wanted to find a place to stay that wasn't the church. It wasn't a home. Staying a few days in the pew of a church isn't very comfortable. She was headed for another city, one with an honorary titan, just until she could make it back home. Then she'd leave the Earth for good and the titans along with it.

She wondered around the city. Perhaps there was a map somewhere? Something. She then saw something popping from the trash bin. It was a map! A sudden gush of wind threw her newfound happiness from her hands.

She couldn't afford a map and the odds of minding another were slim, so she races after the one in sight. It lead her to the alleyway were she finally regained her map.

She was more lost than ever before, and in an abandoned area. She was alone. More so now then ever before. With her powers she was safe, right?

"Lost, princess?" A familiar voice asked.

Star turned around to see X hanging upside down eye level with her. For some reason she pushed away the sudden instinct to fight him.

"What are you doing here?" She asked.

"Thieving. What else?"

Star glared at him.

"Relax, princess. I haven't stolen anything…yet. The better question is why you are here?"

"That is business of my own I do not wish to share. " She said walking off.

He suddenly was behind her as she turned as she went to push hi out of her way he moved again, she turned and missed him and he was once again behind her she went to slap him but he caught her hand. Her eyes suddenly glowed green in furry.

"Easy, princess. Just having fun." He said. "So where are the others? I heard the titans scattered? You stickin' around?"

"No. I plan on going home."

"Oh. So the titans really are history, eh?"

Star looked away. A sad expression, one of remorse, a melancholy depression.

_Stupid_, he thought to himself, _why say that to her? Stupid_!

"I mean, your on your own now?"

She nodded.

"Anyplace to stay?"

She shook her head. "Not anymore. I'm on my own now."

X rubbed the back of his neck. A tension spot. All he wanted now was to make her smile.

"Sorry to hear that princess."

"Why do you keep calling me that?" She asked.

"Princess? Well, I guess a few reasons."

"Yes?"

X felt himself blush, thank the lord he had a mask. Even better than the lord Starfire could not read minds.  
"Well, you're pretty, like a princess."

"Being pretty makes someone a princess?"

"I guess." X shrugged.

"So you think I am pretty?"

X blushed again.

"Umm…yeah…sure…I uhhh…think your…very petty…Starfire.."

Star smiled. X wasn't acting like a jerk this time. He was being sincere, kind, and a bit awkward. He was a lot like…."You remind me of him."

"You mean him, him, right?" He asked. "Your friend?"

She sadly nodded. "Yes. Right now, you remind me of him." Her face saddened. "He never stole. Only once, and that wasn't his fault."

X was confused. The bird boy was once a thief? He looked at Star and couldn't help himself.

"Hey, uhhh, Star…." He took in a deep breath. "Why don't you…umm…you can….I mean if you want you can…look I….we…you can….do you wanna stay at my place? At least until you're able to get home? Where ever that is?"

"My home is Tameran."

"Tama what?"

"A planet not near here-"

"Wait you're home is a whole other planet?"

She nodded. "I am the princess of Tameran."

X felt his jaw drop. "Oh…okay.." He said. "You wanna take up my offer or not?"

Star thought about it. "You're a thief. You've stolen form…him…and brought X back and….you want me to stay with you? Why should I?"

"I can think of a few perks." He said smiling. If she's from another planet and she's leaving this hero business I can be myself with her. She can know the real me.

"What are these 'perks'?" She asked.

"Well for starters you don't have to stand alone in the rain."

"It is not raining."

"It will. Trust me."

Star looked up at the grey sky.

"Plus you can figure out where you're going and how to get there. Get supplies, have a meal, get some sleep in a bed instead of what ever park bench you've been sleeping on-"

"I've been staying my nights in a church." She said matter-of-fact.

"Okay, still think a warm bed is better than a church pew."

Star became silent.

"And you'll get to know the real me."

Star looked up. "What do you mean?"

"Ever wondered who is Red X?"

"Of course I have wondered. We all wondered. He especially wondered."

"Well wonder no more. After all, I'm no going to strut around my place in my costume. I'll be the real me. You can find out what you've wondered ever since you meet me."

Star was tempted, oh yes she was tempted. Robin would've wanted to know, but he wouldn't have done it this way. No, she had to. This was her best option.

"Okay."

"Really?" X asked.

"Yes, I'll 'take you up' on your offer. I'd like to know the real you."

**Jump City Park…**

It was nearing the end of winter. Soon spring would start. Terra honestly preferred winter. The cold reminded her of herself. Something most people stayed away from, but in other cases, were inexplicitly attracted to. A black rose with long thorns that got smaller and sparer the more who tried to discover every aspect of the flower.

"Hey, Tara?"

Terra looked up at Beast Boy.

"Yeah?"

"I'm not intruding am I?

"What?"

"It's just that," he rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. "It's been a while and I've just been mooching off your family."

"You haven't been mooching!"

"You sure?"

"You've been doing like all the chores in the house and looking for a job on your spare time, you're trying and honestly we wouldn't blame you even if you happened to mooch a little. Not after everything that's happened to you. Besides, you've saved the city countless times. I think you've earned to mooch a little."

"So I am mooching?"

"NO!" She giggled. "You're doing just fine, Beast Boy."

He smiled as she got closer. Walking in the park was the perfect way to spend an afternoon. Beast Boy was lucky he was able to stay with Tara's family. They loved having him there. He was such a nice kid. Too bad it wouldn't last.

**Somewhere in Jump City…**

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick…

Raven felt herself in darkness. It was like her soul was floating above the world.

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick…

She felt herself being called back. The world felt a little warmer a light reached for her.

Tick, tick, tick, tick…tick..tick…tick..

Raven gasped as she sat up straight in a hurry. Her heart rate slowed. She looked around the room. It looked like a hotel bedroom. She was all alone in the room. The door was shut and the bathroom door was open. She was in a bed, wearing clothes, a robe more specificlally, that were not her own. Her regular clothes were laid out on the table next to her. The clock showed 12:01 PM.

Had she slept past breakfast? Obviously. Where was she? Who's clothes was she wearing. Raven blushed to think who undressed her. Wait. How'd she get here.

Raven peered into her memories. What happened last night? She saw a flash of light. It was a blur. A man getting tossed in the mud, an agile figure, a mask….ROBIN!

Raven heard a door shut from the other end of her own. She threw of the covers and rushed to the doorway. She opened the door and saw the rest of the room. A TV with a table and couch and a kitchen. A figure popped up from behind the bar table. Raven's jaw dropped.

"Mornin'!" He said.

"Speedy! You-you-you-"

"Saved you butt? Yeah, you're welcome. What were you doing there anyway?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Patrolling. I was on my way to see you guys and stopped here for the night and decided to go out for a bit. Lucky for you I did. "

Raven looked down at the floor. So it wasn't Robin then. Go figure. Wait, was it Speedy who-?

"Your clothes were pretty messed up. I had them washed but the holes are still there. We can go back to the tower and-"

"No! I'm not going back. At least…not yet."

"Okay?"

"Was it you who undressed me?" Raven asked with a straight face in a monotone voice. Speedy flipped out.

"What? Me? NO! Of course not! I swear!"

"Then who did?"  
"Muriel. She's a maid here. Figured better a lady you don't know than me, right? Your clothes were also soaking wet and covered in mud. What have you been doing, Raven?"

"Where am I?"

"A hotel, my hotel room."

"Why?"

"Well…..you needed help-"

"I had everything under control." She said.

"Not from where I was standing." Speedy wasn't going to let her do this to herself. She needed help, and she needed to admit it.

"I have to go."

"Where? I thought you weren't going back to Titan Tower?"

"Back to the city."

"Not where I found you?"

Raven nodded. "Exactly there."

"Raven, you're making a mistake. Why on earth would you want to go back there?"

"I'm looking for someone. And he is most certainly there."

Speedy grabbed Raven by the shoulders. He could tell she was still weak, but Raven was not one to mess with. If she wanted to go then she'd go no matter what. But as a friend he wouldn't let he do this to herself. Raven opened her mouth in protect but was cut short by Speedy suddenly embracing her in a hug.

"I miss him too, Raven. I really do."

Raven held back the tears. She felt herself choking n her own words. She was completely flustered which didn't help. _Pull yourself together_, she thought.

"I'm not looking for Robin."

Speedy released her and Raven looked him straight in the eye well mask. Just like Robin, straight into his mask. Right into that darned fog. It was just like that! It really and truly was just like that. Looking Robin in the eye meant looking him in the mask and falling into the fog and eventually her flashlight ran out of batteries and she was left there all alone with nothing but eh darkness.

"Then who?"

"His name is Red X."

Speedy raised a brow. This was an unfamiliar name.  
"Red X?"

"We're not sure who he really is. All he is, is a thief-"

"Then why are you chasing him?" Speedy snapped.

"I haven't found him yet to chase." She said calmly and matter-of-fact.

Speedy threw his arms in the air.

"Well, that's just great! Your looking for some guy who sometimes picks pockets under the name 'Red X' and worse you don't have a clue where he is! But the best part is you've left all your friends in a frantic search for some petty thief! And for what, Raven? Why did you almost get yourself killed? What reasoning could possibly make you think that was a good choice? What possessed you to make you think going off like that was a good idea?"

"I have a hunch-"

"A hunch? You almost-" Speedy stopped. Raven had fallen silent but her eyes hadn't yet back down. Things were just heating up. Speedy rubbed his chin then looked straight at her. "You could've died. What we're you thinking?" He said softer. "Out on the streets of the city at night? For a hunch on a crook's whereabouts?"

"I need his help."

"His help?" Speedy said in a way that made her flinch inside. _Just like him_, she thought.

"I think he can help me find Robin."

"Hey, you know me. I'm all for finding Robin but going off into the city slums by yourself?"

"I have my powers."

"You were barley strong enough to stand let alone fight!"

"I could've handled it."

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT! YOU WENT OFF INTO THE CITY AT NIGHT ALL ALONE, RAVEN! DON'T FORGET YOU A GIRL!"

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?" Raven said as loud as she could in her monotone voice. "Me being a girl doesn't affect my ability to fight!"

Speedy shook his head." God, you're so…so! ARG! God, Raven. What were you thinking? Do you honestly think Robin would want you to do this."

"No." She said with a straight face. "In fact I know for a fact he wouldn't want me to do any of this."

Speedy gestured in a way that said well there ya go! But Raven wasn't done. A sudden sense of passion roared in her eyes yet Speedy lonely half listened

"But I also know for a fact he'd do twice as much if it were me so I owe it to him-"

"You don't owe it to him to throw your life down a sewer plant chasing shadows all for someone who is probably dead!" Raven looked at the floor. She held back her emotions but heaven knows she was trying oh so hard not to just let go and scream, tearing everything apart. Speedy looked away. "I shouldn't have said that." Raven wasn't listening she was already on her way out the door, still wearing the robe. "Raven. Wait. I'm s-'m sorry okay? I'm sorry! I should have sa-were are you going? You can't just go out in a bathrobe! Raven? RAVEN!"

Just as Raven was about to walk into the elevator Speedy pulled her back. She was still so weak, she couldn't even fight back with her powers.

"Let me go." She said.

"No! I already lost a friend! I'm not losing another! Especially when I have the ability to prevent anything bad from happening to you! I'm not just going to let you walk away!"

Raven thought of that night. Robin…she let him just walk away…she could've…it was too much for her to bear. She could no longer resist the tears.

"Raven? Hey? What's wrong?" Speedy asked softly. He heard a little squeak then a hiccupping sound coming form Raven who was now curled up against his chest.

"I let him just walk away." She whispered. "I could've stopped it! It was my fault! It as all my fault!" She let the tears slowly slip down her cheeks, still holding back her tears.

"Oh, Raven. It wasn't your fault. Come on. I'm taking you back to my room. If were going after this X guy, were doing it on my terms: together and with a plan.


End file.
